The beginning, A Boock I Ov Supreme Magick… The Heart Ov Universe.
A ship wrecked engine tore out for the beating of a vampire who built the clock, to attach to his heartbeat, and it was these and other clocks, to make him forget his death, the beating of his death on earth, the waiting for that love on beyonders journeys. That may pound away so he could hear it, the bashing of the beating of his heart, the bashing of the seconds of these barren wastelands, of the utter descending depths of the amorous…
See You Once Upon A Time…
A Steampunk Story of a new Romeo And Juliette written in love letters, an Ode to a girl called everything… Which i was n’t allowed to see. That or the Irony Of Everything, A proof where realism was just the convention agreed on reality, but in effect reality was pure romance…
A Thriller! With a Happy Ending!?
Because when you read this, the letters already have reached her…
A story of Not too long ago…
Or
THE OTHER SIDE OF THE SUN
The curse of the crooked eyes of future despair, and evil, and utter unhappiness innovative so much and new, of those who refuted the drama and even the revenge of drama.
“”YOU DEAD CORNER
BLIND WITH ME THE OTHER SIDE OF MY EYES
YOU THAT REGARD ALL THIS EQUALLY FUTILE
ASSEMBLE YOUR STRENGTH WITH MY OUR DESTINY
flock as with red wings
towards a green clouded skies
no walls may hold us
no small thought may bind us
no vision can be too great for us
no romance too peculiar
It is here my story begins where i call upon the antimuse to not trod on my heart, twenty years of humiliation and they want to put a dot on the last line. Alas. The trick to obey was mastered, the trick to obey was learnt, eightythousand dark legions are ready, the police and all the worlds armies will listen to absolute hope, at the brink of absolute decay, the exponential line of evolution has gone to its vertical position, everything speeds up and its the uphill to the ship where it now slides into the abyss with a violant storm, as if cause indeed by a butterflies wings at the other side of a sun. lonely in the brink of darkness without a realm of comforting flowers…
I call here upon the antimuses to relax, to not plunge me into despair and not blow out the last little candle of which today they said blows in my heart, its a small flame they said, it will be around forever, its a compliment, but if i do not take great care with these advances on death and rot reality wants to bid me. Its a small fate if one is not careful and courageous, and sees things in advance, one has to clean these palace hallways before it becomes dirty. And when they would have polluted it before the floors were clean, they would have blown out the very soul of light.
So they said they were reminded of the band playing on the titanic, so they said my idea to make more ships from the wreckage still there, and to have the band go first, something i would do at the other side of the ship where it is calm.
I know who gets the first to safety, my love, i know the band and i look, glance, at everyone at the other side, and come get them, and row again to come get, save, lovers, for which love to save is my deepest concern, and they have wrecked mine. Which is the greatest and last injustice brought upon me.
realism is just an agreement, least of it all is it the truth.
Common sense, we can quote villiers on that. Brother and son of fantasts who ruined him...
Realism, opposed to religion and faith, is also realized
Its the very faith of emptiness.
Its the very faith of this world.
It is the structure.
It is the glorious death of all elves and vampires and angels, glorious as their everlasting hearts, it is the will of the lack of faith, the nothing, which marches on to have not oblivion but what is even worse but oblivion. THe last second of it.
Which forever would freeze in the universe, as where the universe would be so scared and disappointed, and yes, when the universe would see and KNOW US to die, as we can see the universe and make it aware in our gazes, it is so sure that universe for that would collaps. Upon the last remnants of that before the barren desert would take that away which loves as breathes, humanity, in which the forms of the three holy and more holy have appeared, the angels the vampires the elves the emo’s the joan arcs the shieldmaidens and so much more, an ilhline reality, and succubs, an unfortunate muse of which this is the treatise…
A treatise that now began with every bit of communication lost and severed, as violently opposed, the second stage of the ways of verity, the last stage, acceptance as self evidence, that as much did the realists not expect. A treatise that now began with every bit of communication lost and severed, as violently opposed, the second stage of the ways of verity, the last stage, acceptance as self evidence, that as much did the realists not expect.
But in what the universe collapses if there was no vampire becoming real or drama at all, if it was not the ultimate to create, the universe would collapse in anxiety, and so it is that the universe created me, a vampire clock maker, which clocks have to bash in my skull the end, death, or love, they must gnaw their spasms away on the very anvil of time untill the anvil does not exist.
Yes the universe would collapse in anxiety for death, and if it could only make death. The universe if only looked at suns or flowers, and even suns that created everything, like the first sun of everything, as i had invented.
INdeed, if it could not create death in life, if it could not create an ultimate living soul, something so defiant of belief, something so indeed unique, to actually carry and had created this world, so it would collapse in anxiety.
And this is where these letters and this story in these letters begin.
As you shall at last know, that my heart is ivory and gold from the other side of existence, so infinite, it is violant and large as any infinity, it is a curse that is violant as a sun under storm, deep storms, but it is a blessing, and reaches, is bestowed, ultimate blessings. It is simple how reality, which proven will and illusion by many, wraps around me in past and present and future, and how i hold dear this future and mended in despair.
I mended in despair this future with another figment of anomaly, of antihuman vampiric reversed fives. It is my mind, more so a curse then my heart, but equally entwined in their brilliance, where chaos and destiny, and the thoughts about, so majestically and frantically collide. Where it is the absolute opposition of stupidity, a side species of the moron, like mankind is a side species, a brother of the ape.
It is rich in heroism and active duty, as some that had simply stood ordered at their post and would not flee a vulcano if the lava would consume them.
A post is a post, it was that simple to me.
So Sure it is that i sit up to guard the whole central continent of heaven called aerewhvea.
Rich in cultures as no other and is it sent out its unimbilqual theories to all that is there as a beginning of a banner onwards in this universe.
It certain that thetis and antithesis and synthetis the angels could only weave cancer on their nails that slide over the threads of these spinwheels and craft with their nails threads of ice, if not for aewvhenounea and ewvhenesthehh and emmeyaelle the succubs who weave the threads of fire into the future, of which emeyheaelle the future sits first, relaxed, blowing pink smoke from her lips into the future.
Now then let me tell you. That in the abyss, lays one sweetest pearl, at the very depths, never before seen, of which this story soaks in darkness and oblivion, a sweet oblivion. A loathsome gift it was, and a tragedy or purest nectar. It was reclusiveness the ivory that grew its shell. And waiting for the gazes of the wonderers above, of which you have been found you careless seeker of wonder who managed to reach these sentences, surely enough your innocence alone could open the gates of hell in that marvel more splendorous that it could build entire heavens of diamond and pearls as such. KNow that in that, there is no tragedy greater, then when it begins with tragedy, and ends in bliss, no earlier have we truly trembled, then having the opportunity other then sadness of a story to end, then the extacy of eternity. WHere entropy is overcome by these heavy clocks of which I make, that were made for the love of my life. The only love of my life, for which the clocks pounded and hammered on death or love.
As much as certainly there are explosions as implosions, so it is that my heart, burning as screaming for blisses and actually realizing them, and more certainly my mind, this caterpillar running throughout perception, as i said weary, on the brink, of chaos and destiny as i realize it, was as sure as my existence be a vampire, as sure as a lightning strike is robed by thunder, its even so that a thunder could create a lightning strike as the very unique species of vampire that I am. I been foretold a great destiny, as they even were scared before i was born, when they gave me my name, and they were so scared, that they completely squandered my name. Little of virtue, or poets have been lecturing me in this era before the Sphinx when i was born, When 200 years have finally gotten me to the age of 47, of which now i lost my immortality, and science is just a cosmetic trick on my body, like a touch of even hardly visible make up to a young girl. The first make up she tried, the first time make up adorned her face. A virginous treat of a painter on a canvas. Would you not shutter, like a vampire indeed, when you know every step was a first touch to a canvas that needed to lead to a perfect painting? Would not your life be miserable as you stood before a masterpiece of a white page? Every living second?
It is as such that a Succubi was sent, to make those clocks, to hold me sane, balanced, a treat, vacuous, civil, as i called her a lecturing cow once. As i said she was conservative once. As she told me her age and finally fell for a number, a number i would later demolish, as my sweetest moment on earth, was when i gave her a pastry pie cupcake and it had two candles for 25 her birthday. Gratifying, perfection, i’m sorry, she said it was rather disappointing the cakes that day. Its glorious how unhappines can put gold and emerald on my armor, the intricacies of injustice of reality in which i have no hand.
But the story then begins, when i say, that where i am so lucky. That is my idea that, in a curse, the curse of luck, i have as an absolute darkness and laying in this abyss, for sure an everlasting attention to have all this thunder around me, be set to bliss with a touch or my best wishes that someone may be as lucky as me, maybe, this, from the heights where i will rise, is more so a reign of turning the other cheek, of which twenty years of humiliation and the depths of hell, have brought me to these steps where every letter should testify of me, of being a martyr in disguise, my vampires, for a friendly tap on the shoulder, would bash you to the lower depths of an ebony ruin.
Have you gathered enough courage to seep into the sadness of these pages of which gives me finally my crown of ivory even if i am not nothing but black cat torturing darkness?
Then bid thee well you future, that i carried so longs its torch in nothingness. My reign is the past where i wave at you, the leach has sucked my soul to artisan decorative nightmares so sweet and opaline.
That indeed the vestiges of dignity, be my guests in this trodden palace, where you to toil on the future, mere dance around a stationary accursed poet. Understood by everyone and no one. It would only be understood this is my last warning to you, that fiction in this cold reality, has a kind and agreeable warm spot to look out for you. Across the ether, and in my very soul of which i have been always acting fiction, that fiction and reality, seduced those by the bare restraints of this lack of providence, it is treu that in me myself it is proven that God knows camouflage. And that it robed the world in sickness, and only children would still be worthy of golden hearts, so they shine brighter, for the simple act because that was always providence, and to have the riches of ivory crowns and oak crowns and… Many crowns to one, at the precipice of self realisation, at least, where that illusion that a future would n’t look out for you, was for a moment proven, so that when you march for immortality that child of utter sensitivity, that i needed not fear anymore. To be born a king you would always have that fear, the self declared prince of darkness, or king of darkness as i have become, as the constitutional prince of darkness has deceased yesterday, it is not a coincidence, in that let you be known, that luck? If it exists, and if you found it, is the same as accidence, an organic material, a stone, a crystal, of equal majesty, if you thought you were mold, you are part of mold, but you are equally majestic as mold, nature, you are part of nature, and you thought there were parasites, and you thought what injustice could do this as God then is intolerable, but I am a vampire, and that is that i am a parasite, the most fortunate and noble gift upon this ruin of a ship. A vast land of which continents and earths drift around a flame a sun. a lightning strike spins now as a fire like my pen as i write this. The story is finished, certainty as matter has entered my mind, the mission to make my heart glow forever is a creed of which many exist to a sacrifice to something born from such unfortunate, and had been courageous, and found such ordeals, practical events, unleashed in his insecurity such dramas already, here is told of one such drama which no one can process without to have been pulled into the very soul of love, and the soul of light. And then we can say, as Faust foretold, that light is love, that luck, is the highest, and therefore there is no manure truly devastating looking back, we humanity with a vampire, have gained gold out of five of the most desolate miracles, and it pulled us out of demise, as much as demise was created by that sad poet, who wrote saying these all were just poets, and how could you not need a sign when you in that enlightenment had
For the first issue
Denounced the most absolute.
And for the second issue
Already won, when you gave your life for a truth of infinity.
The Gift you wanted, was impossible.
And i am that in its name.
And then we can say, as Faust foretold, that light is love, that luck, is the highest, and therefore there is no manure truly devastating looking back, we humanity with a vampire, have gained gold out of five of the most desolate miracles, and it pulled us out of demise, as much as demise was created by that sad poet, who wrote saying these all were just poets, and how could you not need a sign when you in that enlightenment had
For the first issue
Denounced the most absolute.
And for the second issue
Already won, when you gave your life for a truth of infinity.
The Gift you wanted, was impossible.
And i am that in its name.
For that, and entirely ironicly too, i was spawned by the torment of the least expectancy, those that did everything to install a normal life, and what a surprise when everyone had that, I was very alone. In that loneliness too was my thunder. Of which now the words of serenity will stifle back the eyes that needed mending with a slap in the face, of flowers, or, whatever works then.
AGNOCTICISM IS THE WORST OFFENCE, TO LEAVE THAT AND EVEN THE SYMPATHY WITH HIM IN SUCH AS A THEISM, THAT FIGHTS HIM TO THE DEATH UNTILL IT IS PROVEN WILL HAVE THE A THEISTS THE HIGHEST REWARDS EVEN, AGNOSTICISM IS THE ANGELS STRUNG UP IN A PERPETUAL STATE OF NOTHINGNESS AND LACK OF EXPECTATION. AN EVOLUTION AS SUCH. Without even… LIFE?!
I’m Sorry To Do This, But I Can’t Go Without You Anymore…
I just took a fresh shower in these rains that dance as blossoms, beginning my letters to my most renowned love, a love impossible as butterflies that would go there, to the sky, attracted to sunlight, how in this cocoon of this castle and my residence, a dungeon of books and arts of exquisite tastes, where roam people who say i beg with a golden cup, or adorn my eyes with compliments, and in this rain then of today and and woe, and, tears, and bleeding, and a rainy cloud, and i stood in it, and came a liittttttle bit to my senses, if this is humanly possible in my, or OUR situation as it stands right.
No raindrop ever missed me, and you have TOLD me that you missed me.
You literally said that.
It is the literal accomplishment of genius and friendship, more akin to any story that i know, where it is the opposite of eating dirt and liking it.
What you diddd. This last meeting, your goodbye, Meant the world to me.
Its once upon a time when you read this, and i’ll tryyyyy not to post anything on your distant plains sending messengers until that time.
I mean.
Do you care just a sliiiight bit too much about me.
Your very again, unprofessional, delightfull effort in inviting me over, did n’t do us a lot of good did it. The tension was exacerbating.
I HOPE you have enjoyed your trip to sethefryheya. Dearrrr meeeeeee, if you say you feel awful without me i swear. I CAN NOT SURVIVE THAT.
THis is not humane.
Do you believe me?
You know what this Castle of Lhy is?
Where we met, where i stowed in cages as the future.
And accused of hate, when nothing i did was to defend love.
Defend love with hate yes.
THat is done.
Hate as the armor of love.
But it is still the armor in which love walks.
I walked into The Castle of Lhy saying there is a problem with TIME
After that i REVOLTED
Now
That is not Delusional
I am not Delusional
Everything is delusional
They admit everything is an illusion
They just think the norm stinks
Like that movie future world.
Which we will see then.
Together.
There is a machine of the future keeping the world of rot alive
Maybe its the worthlessness everyone craves.
The norm, believes, is as sending panthers into the fire.
Its like the sheep, who dance around it, bleeting against the destiny and the future.
Sheeps tastes, sheep visions.
YOU
Could
Do one thing, and that is, to SPOIL me with your amazing presence, with all these smiles and your looks, you can even stare so dumb again at the seiling owh my god what are you doing to me. Everything about you is pure duts veulen vlinder and deer and hertje is n’t it?
YOU COULD ALSO very much support me and help me in my work.
Which is all these ecologic and esthetic ideas.
And you could do that by meeting me outside of castle of Lhy.
IF there is any remnant of what we had when we met before your trip.
THen i don’t think you will mind so much.
Hey. I love you sooo much, i know i’m a bit old and worn and not exactly relationship material, so i won’t blame you okaaaay. BUT i neeeddddd to see you outside of this stinking sesspit of toxic monks priests and nons and toxic control and conditioning.
Now its my turn to invite you okay?
IN THE REAL WORLD PERHAPS?
LIKE?
I’m sorrrrrrry soooooooo much for what i did, when i saw you there, my, but it grew from there, now we know what we have in eachother.
So.
IM SO sorry you left to your trip with mixed feelings perhaps riiight?
Awwww.
And IM SO sorry i’m a bit late on TRYING to deal with this
As i did n’t want to intrude.
BUT
RELATIONSHIP MATERIAL OR NOT
We need to be together for a bit.
This should n’t be the most miserable time of our lives, awwh, when i see you.
You know your expressions are such an intoxicating presence of your mind life and its such such a beauty in your skull heheheh.
THIS HAS TO HAPPEN
You know it.
You KNOW you should support me.
You KNOW you want to watch the mehre with me.
YOU KNOW you want to be pulled into my world
AND YOU KNOW i DESPERATLY need that
To have a treu company in there
So it ‘d still be kinda professional.
But we be verrrrrry gentle and kind as we should and as i think you especially deserve after i saw all that there when i came to visit you.
I just felt a little excluded it was a little tactless but i have a lot of pressure and i did n’t feel like we could share this all in such a profound way when you just go “owh no we can’t have a relationship.”
Just be the best you that you can be for me okay.
THAT WILL BE PLENTY
Don’t mention this relationship thingy anymore
I had platonic relationships before you know.
When i was a lot more potent then now. Not that you need to know of course but heyyy eeeeehhhh.
What you DID, and all these things that went on. WERE BREATHTAKING, and it made it a thousand times worse and you know it.
So lets not keep wrecking ourselves.
Here i was thinking i was loving you all by myself.
Here i was thinking, you just felt a little comfortable.
Okay you have gotten me completely and utterly in love with you now mhmmmm
I don’t mind if you just miss me and like me dearly
But then still this psychiatry should n’t mess with us and its toxic attitude.
I BEG YOU
I WILL THANK YOU ETERNALLY.
If you are willing to be my dearrrrrr dearrrrr friend cause i need you DESPERATLY.
I have a lot of stress and pressure, and yeah, laying my head against your head would really take this away from me.
NO RELATIONSHIP
Just let me melt into ya ya brutal dummy
I think, you would like to do that
And i think, i need that more then anything right now.
I mean for the sake of Lhy.
YOU NEED TO HELP ME
Its your Priestess of Lhy Oath?!
And
For what i do for this earth. You need to be around.
You really think i’m delusional?
When you saw my crying for the world, without souls. You thought I was delusional right?
No?
You have any idea how close we are to the end?
If you studied all the material underground.
Anyway yes i just said they should make the machine bigger for proper view.
Listen
Its absolutely treu
That ironically, you have to help me, that is your profession
Ironically
And i can see you tear up
Saying this is a dead end
And you feel rotten again.
SO
These are things we both can’t accept
Now i realize you might have had a pleasant journey so far and to me, to the other side of time, missed like the end of a story of such intoxicating, wounding despair.
And that you forgot all about me
And now i’m here again giving you issues
Upon your return
When you read this wretched story of my hand
When you realize what I made.
Butttt
You gave me issues with seeing me before the trip.
YOU GAVE ME SOME SERIOUS ISSUES
I don’t care if you don’t love me
I just needdddddd to be with you cause of everything i said you are sooooo generous and good and kind and quirky and everything on top i absolutely adore you.
I can’t very well let that go.
And then you consider all these times i made you feel bad, just the tragedy of our situation.
I Want to blow things up in the castle of Lhy sometimes, well often times
And it was not fair to pull you into that.
I just wish i could break you off from it i guess.
Like a piece of ice 😛
THE MAGICK OF THE RELATIONSHIP
Which you hold so dear.
WILL BE RESPECTED
But you KNOW and REALIZE AND FEEL that this whole institution is not what its cooked as to be.
Its the spirit of the time.
You think the angels efpheretheyiyl or eyghnyeii in the past with their dreary and spiritual isopoems bringing these castles of lhies to rise would n’t hold someone if they loved someone and they were their patients?
I WILL need to read you a LOT OF ROMANTIC BOOKS, to forget, psychosis, delusions, whatever its called, in worse or ancient ways, the magick is rot, it kept getting rotter at the discourse of reality, an enlightenment that was never that, and in which i toil and pull, and which you know i must rise above, and what that is, and REALITY and what that is supposed to be according to regular people.
CHAPTER I
THE FIRST DAY…
So once Ehneschzscheye would sign over a paper to get hired by an academy.
Now they need all these rules and no genius can get through.
And these rules are supposed to be science, their corrupt magick of a failing agnosticism, that creates emptiness? How in their years of their belligerence at me have they tore me down to the depths where i knew absolutely, that that what they told, was the lost cause, and that attracted me somehow, to find the holy and bountiful which i consider an equal kind, or what in the future will appear, a kinship more excriating and impossible, indeed the bullying never stops it never stops.
And this science is supposed to keep our bond apart? What an obsolete magick.
How futile.
WHat lands do they mean to invent for perfect opposites, or particles who are connected as you admitted. Something, i did n’t think or had been aware it could ever be said or pronounced or felt.
WHat you did none has did, what you said none had said.
I dread, that your cake companies were only that.
But i thank them.
Because that was my holy moment.
Was on which i will bestow them and you and everyone they will love with a whole largest ship full stowed its lower decks with cakes
And feed them so.
Whipped cream all around
Even for doctors who had cursed me so perfectly.
For the time and position, that me i am here and now here.
As certain as that, once upon a time has once and time in it, and that means that loves woes of infinity will one day end, which is reasonably comforting for what i am and am becoming.
As i become as i crave and battle my transformation, Or transformations so many.
And this bond that is apart now is supposed to make us both miserable???
DEAR A DEAR TRAIL
“een dood spoor en hoe je daar zat”
“Zeg nu nog dat vrouwen niet passief zijn. 😛”
You should have learnt the first word that is needed in dutch
And look at it more often
A cocoon
A butterfly, like myself, never remains and can cast any stigma of this castle of lhy
I’m already cleaned
There is no vestige of verdict that i am a danger to myself or others
The rest is futile
There is no vestige of verdict ANYMORE that i am a danger to myself or to others.
The verdict was always just that crafted by norm souls of Lhy.
This devise is merely a cocoon.
WHere i lay for you
Where I made a curtsy for you.
WHere i spawn
So lucky you caught me at the very end
And where part of this clock called reality.
What a mechanism no?
I can’t looze you either in explaining the urgence of this revolt
This all both of us being kinda a little bit in love or something?
Is clouding our judgement, then we think we need to build something and such
But this is not possible anyway
We need a grand make over
I did n’t choose this myself either
But i’m well here i assure you
I been here more often
And i’m a free patient you know
I could leave if i get a lawyer, finally get off this medication, or these potions of magick, medication would instill the notion of any illness, like it is a not passing, and very real remedy. if they can clearly see it was already fifteen years for just throwing a printing press down the staircase because my machine to build the mehre a new portal was n’t working and i was totally secluded
But i am secluded NOW
FROM YOU
And no i can’t handle this as a dead trail either
Now you truly did too much damage hahahahah
And you KNOW itttt
Egggggh
You really did ittt
NOW I SUFFER, BECAUSE YOU SUFFER
Do you understand that
I thought i loved you alone
But you miss me
And you sit there sobbing
You sat there sobbing…
And i can’t tolerate me making you unhappy
I can’t bearrrr thaaaat nooooo pleaaaase
Thats so heavy
And you saying, i let you too close
As if there is some kind of free will there
These things happen
Our first encounter was so absurd
I can’t believe we did n’t see it
So funny
I thought this would be like before
You staring at me
Like a child to a pie
But
My
Have we evolved
Now we both going to want to die
Forever
Or we do something about this situation okay?
Because this is not okay.
These etiquettes myyy
What situation did we get ourselves into.
Not that i am a mental patient
Not that you are a psychologist
But how with these rules will we both ever find a balance that we need?
Now i TRUST
That you will reply in some spirited moment in this long eternity
Hundred percent right we will do something about this
Because frankly after what i have seen in you
I can’t bear not holding you and giving you a VERY tight hug
I mean
Owhhhh
I think the world will come to an end
By people following rules
By there not being an aristocracy to decide where things go
And here we are
Stuck with the status quo again
Ruining our very hearts solace right now
Its neat and tidy if you believe in the rules
But if you resist them the puss comes out
Like i am a living testament to.
You can see people go sour.
And this puss, will only become worse
You and me have to make a stand
We can do this
I can do this with your help
With your support
Now i know the portal sucks
The portal with which we called eachother onto misery as much as my portal of the mehre right now
After fifteen year of trying to set it up
This ayris machine, dream machine, beauty machine, or ayris matrix destroyer.
We’ll work on it
It needs to work
All these underground legions are waiting
I gave you the lyrics their magick and poetry sullen with defiance.
Read them again please??
I’m trying not to be unhappy thinking you’ll miss me on your trip now
Eeeeegh
Once upon a time has just started
And yeah the letters coming in, you block that i get that
Mmmm
But aaaayyyy
What did yoooououuouo pull me into
Now its really a lot worse
I mean i loved you
But that was playful still
Now
Before i was occasionally drunk
Now
I’m floating in the room with every fibre almost split apart
But you also pulled me into your unhappiness missing which is sooooooooo bloody unbearable.
I did n’t know that how could i know
I mean i thought you liked me more then the usual person
But not this
Whatever your beautiful heart desires
YOU MUST have that you got that?
I will not tolerate no martyr maiden missing me like that.
My world is in tatters
I was working so well
And now you just pull my heart to you completely
And i cannot think of anything else
Like my worlds are not real anymore
And only you exist
How i hurt you with my letters
And now hurt, missing me
And now the torment really reversed on me
And now i truly and truly began to care uff
Stoned
I must sleep ufffff
Soooo damn professional indeed haahhahah
Wants to see me before hertjourney
And with her charms and all her sobbing
Gives me a monster of an affectionate overload for her
Bravest of the psychologists, dares to color outside the lines
Caring yes
Most naive of all the psychologist
Because she is conflicted about treating patients with her little notebook
I mean
As if this was n’t a conditioning control camp run by the subject rule???
You know again
I told you this right?
Typical people get the same kicks out of the modular tasks
Atypical are a little off the charts
Does n’t that qualify as meriting therapeutical value?
Are you an npc?
Are you a non personality, or non playable character?
I did n’t hink so.
Well yur a bit of a vacuum
And as i said and insisted those books are going to make a mess of you.
I got better books.
The vampire myth they would be on to you you would have chosen that because of me
I told you it begins with the Wrakolak and the strigoii in ancient Wgrherheyiiisse
But the books to define something as the other
How you suffer because of that
How i must pull out
And having to pull everyone out
But the end of reality has insanity below hell
And anaehtheana is here already
But below is NOW rising.
IT IS RISING
They are all summoned
Anaehtheana had such a long journey
But these legions
They are something to rise so high.
You starting to like them too.
The books left to oblivion
How sceptical you are over rotten old books
Just the hertje who never read a thing
Whereas i have read most things worth and all the right sentences to be on this split second in this sentence hahah
Do books even exist?
TO YOU?
Hahahah
Sentences everywhere, books do not exist, books are not bound by the pages on which their letters are printed you know.
You will see myths and figments and tales of the mehre that screens as they call it.
They are quite interesting.
You just a little presumptuous.
Now we are humans
Well we are devils and succubis maybe
Maybe this is how devils and succubis are spawned
Like how can this be, conflicted, this thing we have now.
Mmmmm
I take you seriously.
Thats how i found such love for you.
This has become a bit of an existential crisis right now for myself
And for you apparently.
So emm
Please do take my world seriously then as well
Don’t just, say yeah, whatever
I mean
You can say that about games, advertisement, entertainment, how you consume waste?!
My deepest wish and pleasure would be
That there is so much greed in you for these ecological projects
For this earth restoration.
Without which.
We both, our love, will be totally lost and in vain.
Now you know this.
SO LETS FIGHT
Together
Against the world then as you so hesitantly scrutinized and rejected at first.
You and me against the world you said?
Not really.
Mhmm
It seems as if we found ourselves exactly in that position
And it seems like this journey you now went and fleeing from all
Was far destined, but indeed, a unresolve, for that you have been bestowed that mission you had carelessly rejected?!
And thats what i need from you.
That is WHAT THE WORLD needs from you
You lost thing.
YOU LOST THING?!
Not for you to consider the conflicts of psychologists to care for patients.
I need YOU to go EVEN MORE INSANE then you already were.
You even blushed, just to make it complete
Got all nervous again and giggled.
You know as a philosopher, and a hopeless romantic by that, which makes matters worse
I find it all terribly hard to grasp
WHAT on earth did they give you to study?
I mean even ehleshea the second eleshea of Angh, The first being the first angel of angh, apart front eh first battle angel of Angh, handles me more intelligently then you do????
YOU just have n’t got a CLEU???
ITS AMAZING???
You are so, vacuous, you just operate on the sheer beauty of your soul i swear.
But as far as wisdom or knowledge
You are as innocent as they come
And we need to fix that
And somehow we all know how we and who will fix that.
For that
I need to see you.
Suddenly every feature that makes you unique strikes me as the most important and heavenly thing in this universe. Including THAT look at the seiling, and just everything, this package, bringing it before me to watch just does n’t get at all tiresome. mm
TELL ME it did n’t pass
What have you done to me
This is just the first night
CHAPTER II
SECOND DAY
You know
What hurt me secondly, apart from you saying it sucks to be without me
Which was a disaster, and which like, shown me like stars of fortune
Like winning the lottery again as i so often already have.
It just does n’t stop sprayinng its money on me
But
The second worst thing.
Its a dead lead hahhh?
So this world of subjects will just carry on its stampede?
You see the consequences of what your saying?
Thats a status quo remark.
Like either we all die in a worst nightmare
And civilization ends
Or i can make a difference
And then its not a dead lead
Then i, we can free ourselves from these constraints
AN UNKNOWN AMOUNT OF THESE FOR YOU TO COME
HOW LONG DOES A FAERYTALE NEED TO BEGIN?!
ONCE UPON A TIME???
Noooooo
Ayayayayay
My love for you was so mellow
But you had to just
Plunge me into your absolute disaster
Sweet and bitter indeed
I can’t process that you would be over me or try to bite your love off.
I don’t know what you are doing with your beautiful mind
Cutting me out right now?
I can’t bear to think of it.
Nobody believes i’m Satan but it surely would be quite a sad Satan
If a succubi who kinda fell in love a little gets over me so fast
Again i need this to go perfect
You and your agreement with our dead moments of conversation
And my imperfection, and just being me
How grateful i can be for that.
Why are all my tirades so far over you the one things i should be most grateful for in you.
HHHHHHH
Now someone said “imagine going on vacation to the worlds most devestating capital”
I said you are of a latest spiritual generosity, you would pet lions and forgive them for killing you as it is in their nature you would go. you would n’t understand.
Damn
Another worry
I trust Sethephreyha will open for you like two beautiful waves
If you get so then assaulted in all these dangers looming there, i will stake people
I will have vampires control and punish ordinary humans
You understand that right?
You need to be well
Ggggggh
Setherphreya
I BLAME YOU
Why on earth would you do that.
Of all these lands the furthest away from sanity or insanity.
Of all these lands
A land where so beyond the angels which are many there are stuck in cages with thick bars
Waiting the pending collapse from their miserable circumstances
The easiest angels to call to heaven.
You must somehow had a little consideration, maybe you of all people could learn and get worried, because you learn from it, if you saw the cages and all the bolted doors some time in passing somewhere
Or you would have chosen a wildly expensive escort and army then to defend you.
I have no idea which is part of your travelling party you never told me
As i only want to know how your journey went ever.
Well as i’m saying to aeNinheah my such loyal and dear friend
You might be biting it away right now
Without me able to do something about it
Without me able to talk to you
Or send you heavy letters
Its killing me
Again when you said sure its all good when i’m with you but then when i’m gone it is “kut”
Nooooo
I can’t bear it
What a thought
Thats like the most miserable thing i ever heard
The Widowtree
Now this song plays pffff
What you did is unforgivable
I would have survived
But now what you gave me
It works like an obsession, perfumes of hormonal toxins spiralling through my body, and going through my neck and pulling to my eyes
I’m totally drowning in this
Now i have to EAT???? EATTTTTT ON THIS STOMACH? WITHOUT YOU ANYWHERE AROUND
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Eat noooo no i havvvve to eat something i mean.
Ugghghgghghh i’m going to THROW UP hahahahahahah
When i see you again forgive if i’m just going to grab you
Would that count as indecency or protocol override?
I really wondered with your leg being under my chair
If you wanted me to kick your leg egggh
Owh my goddesses and muses tell me its treu
Answer me
Every second is a thunderstorm here
I have no idea how i’ll survive this
I feel like you wanted to see me in love for the last time
I can’t let this go
Every moment i remember you saying or laughing our future
I relish
Every time, like the moment you said see you in once
YES
Thats it
I have to keep that in mind
Every time you spoke of disasters they are disasters now that no one can tolerate
No one can bear this
Your talking to a hopeless romantic
You really got the wrong person
Not to take this seriously argh.
Please
They said you don’t have to be here
But alone in my atelier right now
So far away from this place
This doomed place
That had you wondering here
That i could have a chance to see coming from around the corner
And bash into you
Yes
What combustions that would give
If i bumped into you
What an unfortunate expression
How could i know
Chemical warfare i said
Now that was pleasent and funny times
But it seems now you won the war
And i’m here laying all poisoned in my lungs in the ditches in the mud
I’m crying that i should give this world a chance
Deep seethed despair
Everyone so casual
With their modern world of gentle leisure
That they mean to believe
A tear is rolling from my nose
They say they blame artists for getting so much money
That they should do a regular job
As they are thinking of realizing now
I said the world is truly cursed with them
With people who envy a person to have a simple moment of enjoyment
Because their own lives are futile without duty and diligence
Aggressive like ants, but none of the purpose.
No pheromones for them left.
And then i pity them so
And want to help them
Their live is treu gutteral unfortune without purpose like that
Thats what they would hold against you
Mingling the uberspecies with a lowlife ill and contemptuous person like me
How they have indoctrinated you into the caste system
And still because this happened and the way in which it happened
I can’t do away with the thought
That there is an amazing feat of logic in all this legions of melancholy below
And they we wll win with these legions of melancholy
To realize Emma’s world hahh?
An entirely other kind of ethesennhellyiii reality where people have carton board castles.
And i figured it was time to build the real ones around it.
I who branded sadness more beautiful over love
Because it is more sincere
Not entwined with lust and possession
But kindred affectionate more
I who have branded loneliness more beautiful and sincere then friendship
Because in it we become treu gems of our own.
Treasured in this desolation again
I am so weary of lust
Trying to drag all down in the epitome of self sacrifice
Christianity is a sweet thing.
Chastity less toxic then flatulating sprees of sex
Armored beautiful in resilience like a beautiful shining armor
Then i think no one nor you will understand this
(again this was perhaps one last time i gone off course, as i sifen through these pages, for any ill wishes)
I read somewhere
In order to realize ideals you have to start with faith
I began that
Also it made me just think below in the garden
If you want to find love and happiness
You have to embrace purity.
Thats your job now
You have no other job.
As i said, if you embrace and place your faith in life it burns like a torch
And it light lives for others too
There is friendship in that
So many people shine of heroism when they do an ordinary thing
And when they had to pass the treu gate of heroism
They would dare not tred and walk away and grow sour and small.
And rot away.
Do you really want to be the unicorn?
You are the unicorn for your eyes.
A human, i laugh, humans as we can be.
I am the unicorn for my teeth
God gave me not my heterochrome eyes that I have in Heaven.
Or we would be in a completely different place right now.
You would have been the last one
Begging me with such nerve to find you and hold you.
But now are the first one.
Which i want to find and hold.
When as i stated everything is decorative and therefore everything is functional
Its truly those who make the rules who stand there in vain
When everything that is put to use is for beauties sake
As i said in the Bible VII I gave mankind a ladder and said climb as high as you want
And now i’m going to ask God to shake the ladder a bit.
That glance, you suffering
I walk back on my notion that i’m suffering because you are
Maybe its the most beautiful thing you took that upon you
And i need never be alone anymore in that one glance
Where you suffered for me
You looked to your side
You said its kut without you
You looked to your side and said its a dead end
You looked to your side and said psychotherapists necessary whatever
The therapeutic relationship
(I warned you of their ways and words)
And for that moment the whole world came into place
It straightened itself out
You suffered.
How could i touch with a fingertip something so magickally kindred to me like a little lost puppy
Of which you surely needed cuddling like such a little lost puppy on that very moment.
Gravity is also a pulsation in time
There would n’t be beauty, or a worth of existence if we did n’t meet
So sure as you fall from the edifice when you cross over the top ledge
Which is n’t even sure
So more sure is it i fell for you and you for me…
Like we both were lost animals
Hunted and chased
And we just had to jump
All our jump and us on the pavement
Was the absolute guarantee when the first star was born in the universe
Yes i think often you like these baggy shirts on me and not slick ones with holes all over
Projection
Such a holy projection like i never seen
That i did n’t seem at all very happy here
I was okay
But what a projection.
You’r not at all too happy there now.
WHen i saw you then with your elegant walk and all in black
Just a glimpse through a window
Then you were walking with a controlled specimen of this society
And you glanced
And you were glowing
And you were having a woe there
Now i see it
You know Schopenhauer predated Darwin by a couple of years
With his theory on Crystals and corals to vegetative life, instinctive life to motivation and then to genius
The circle is round he says
But all the love songs in the world contest of something completely different
That only in realizing your own myth the circle is round
And for that there are extraordinary aids and ways to achieve it and guide it
I have seen to that
It was mine to bestow upon creation a way more mysterious then God could
My ways, which are all, are indeed more mysterious then Gods ways.
If i have to be a God
To save you
Then i will be a God.
And this world walks around a flower and says how beautiful this flower, as it is slowly dying
And it says it is dying
And dancing around it
Then i will scatter them like a God
I will lead them to grow flowers from its seeds
That is mankind, this gullible, useless creature
For you and mine to behold
For you and mine to lead
Because without a good leader
They will eat their own hearts
They will eat the universe in which they sit
And they will have contempt for everyone that is not swelling of fat for this dull creed of uselessness
And that is psychiatry, the ones they have contempt for
Because they are not eating the universe all up, to devour without purpose
It needed to be proven, that was the conspiracy
And me i would strangle love even
To shed beauty in existence, to see to the next chapter
But it can not be done
Not what the sacredty of it needed be in the first place
The act of the divine as the centerpiece of the arts
My dove that came to me at the downchurning of the absolute depth
Where it was from a heavenly sign a future needed to be crafted
Calling as you part of those more unvanquishable storms i have suffered
Now the angels from the bible belts, that is easy
You are not so easy to overcome
7 million 777 thousand and 777
Exactly that
Not one angel less
With golden claymore swords
Steel angels be the dead corridor of reality already standing ready.
Opening the gates of heaven
We are at the brink.
All for my woes with this coming extinction
That has me no other choice
As i have never had any other choice
Then mend the dialectics of this lingering of faith everywhere
Realize all poetry and prophecy
For that i had more then a dove for a sign
It takes not to be brave, but absolutely there being no other choice
Cast out, i am spilled like a vase of flowers
Broken on the floor
The water all spilled
The flowers a mess
I think yes, you said it, what will he do now
That i could not save that hair i caught from your shoe
That i could not keep it and throw it away
Must be the most indifferent and lauziest and most painfull indiscretion the universe had ever attempted to create.
But in providing you with a robot to gather your hair i mended it
As i do again and again.
You will always remember that wherever you go.
Because it was sweet
And because that was granted
From a little puppy kitten who’s claws and genitals were torn out some time
I am as innocence now with rats laying, with rats fighting in the sewers
Our mortal enemies no more
All in reality is now but ever growing beauty
And then one must set examples
A computer error already prevented my vampires from going on a hysterical frenzy staking the hearts of humans
It is everywhere
How i fail.
How i fall.
How i fell.
Brooding sinister plot against society as the surrealists dedicated humour should perpetuate and nothing else
Starch kind of ever brightened gaze to the beyond, attracted by the future.
We raise ourselves
From our toiled backs in pain.
This mankind will build a reversed hierarchy in despair
And think the world end is salvation then because of that
Like a rotten death to all, and be deserts to all
However nature is nature
You can not kill a lion with a thorn
Alike then they state sex is the highest
And will be infinatly traumatized when it was done unconsentual
This is mere faith
In fact love is the highest
Over will even as it can do such
It is now considered futile
And scoffed when children speak of it
Be realistic right?
Lifes tough lessons on children
Then it begins
They wither and canive and quiver and can not overcome themselves
But i can overcome any hesitation that you have for me
I don’t need you to love you
I will always do that
Alas how merciless, what a whim saying i should not be read by you for these lonely pages where you are in the most desolate of journeys.
I’m GLAD you said see you in once, then, some day, there was politeness
But if you did n’t say that there would not be all of this
So it was reality to decide you had to do that
Your intuition brooding on a moment of recluse
To see to a wild anticipation
Of course this might all be fairly trivial to you when you
Bore to bite away any love in you as i so dread in these moments
That distance finally succeeded to do it for you
And that i lost my grip on you.
Like a demon lost in an occult ritual and the sceance ends.
I have shit to do
I have responsabilities
Among this which is the future
And not only that
But ALL future yes
And not only that
So it may be forgiven by some if i have seen a heart to steal
I will do anything in my power of a heart worthy and akin to mine
I am worthy of many hearts
You might even say i am THE heart
You might not believe it
I certainly would hesitate to say it
But it would never be contested by any
To disprove it then
Is impossible in science
Leave or may be a few dumbasses who would bash a babies skull.
This world
Has only realists
When i said i was an idealist
I’m the only one left
I have experienced that
Even the darkest legions have said
Calling a conquerors wishlist with black auryal soldiers?
They have killed for less they said
So they call a revolution in music
In which i am and in which is my name
And they say when you call it out
They will kill you
And then what would have died in their hands
A vampire with all his vampires staking themselves over pure love and misery
They are the luckiest and the first to go
And anorexics toppling over on their skeleton bones
Second and still most fortunate
And the emo’s and joan of arc legions to go
Finding heaven in a straight trajectory when they are still virgins
And elves, dead by a teardrop
Angels, battling the remaining evils
And the plebejans
Everything else and the last of mankind
The subjects
The consumers
All in anguish, decrepit, hating, now never realizing their mistake
Dancing around the killer
With tortures for him
As to remain existence
That to remain and keep existence being
Maybe to breed another noble heart but who would pick a world like that
The angels would fight bravely
Until no pain was left
And just die of lovehurt
(YOU would cling to me, and freeze the universe with your tears, this is the curse)
Its keen to say
Realism and atheism blind people with rot in their brain
That until the very natural ecstasy that comes from gods blinding light comes back to them
And it will come
Its actually those angels marching out
Then everyone will convert to polygamy and satan and christ all alike
But it will be too late because they all already positioned themselves
Decadence brings disease
Children need forever couples
And this time is approaching
I’d take them all back
I’d build more for millions
If we’d have children ever
Not unthinkable as it is your little slipup that got us into this mess so let me then meander on that strange but beautiful thought
We should live in a monastery all secluded
A monastery of succubi
I’d make sure you won’t pollute them (our children) with realism
We can have throw away diapers if you so choose
I mean you would be the only one who could be allowed to use them
Hand made i guess as no factory in the future is allowed to make them.
If there is a future
It will be because angels fight
And in that future i will govern angels
And in that future
You will be mine
And i will marry you
I want a huuuuge green silk wedding dress for you
I mean is this a slipup?
I trust my lips are not as cacophonic as your concoctions sometimes
So if there is a future
That you loved me
Means i will capture you forever
And that is a fact because i happen to believe in the future
I said it here, there is to be no last stand
A last stand to fight for a loss?
Then its no last stand
I fight as the first battle of heaven, to roam the heavens
Love, children, flowers
Not evil
Evil breeds fear and malign and, despair
Don’t disobey what you feel for me
I trust you, to not do that no matter what.
You said you were despaired
You said distance was good
But not forever
You did n’t say forever
You could n’t or you would have cried
And i would have leaped for you
Reality is romantic not in that way
It is romantic in so much more a way
That this leap had to be buried in the subversive pages
Of this treat of poetry
Proze to some degree
That i as responsibilities had no possibility to care for you as i should have
As i should have cared for everything
But you did n’t say forever
I already cared for you as everything.
In anguish
We could have sealed reality there and then thus
You who know and teaches me
That the timid and not the bean comes for his reward
But you know me, you know you are my reward
And you know when i rage
I have a world to consider
Hurray i say
With you seeing that in 200 years in the history machine
Hurray the vampire has won
The elvin king is a smudge
On his elegance and pronounced features
I’m an old soul i don’t need kinky games
Fetish for latex and baroque there may always be
A satanist? Just a poser, my rituals will always come with cherries and cherry juice
A vampire? Most definitely the vampire from Belgium aehellwvea as its called
Devotee of higher souls
Taking a knee for you or the others is as funny as you picturing me camping i imagine
Its ironic i would choose the cross
And fit it high on my own cross
But it was always to be so and very essential
In order not to see an evil that, in me, would seeth the universe with fear and anxiety
I could brush it off my sleeve
As my vampires could stake people
And brush it off their and ours sleeves
But time space and causality has its gifts
This way or another
It bestows us with romance
They will fear us
But we don’t even NEED to kill them for them to fear us
Because they will always see they deserve it
And they will be always attracted to our mayhem
And when we give them mercy
They will cry in adoration
And at that moment they know they will die in peace
As we can not
(and i’m called a villain for that, more like, i am the matronage of stilled pains and soothing waters, the meandering of bliss in reality, the thief of gold more blonde and with hearts, that treasures that lay dormant also, as the sacks of filth which broods other things that in the arcana symbols of the mehre is told of, we can see all that some time, i will explain you then how the spirits that i control through arts work)
Your notions on me being a vampire were rather sparse in credible customary to me
In hell i go for that yes
Not entirely undone by that either
You realize you can not prove how far i go back or how long i live right?
My name is infinity you know
The reversed five for antihumanity
The ultimate?
Seeing the guilty tremble
Goodness was always more evil then dread and hysteria
We will never kill a soul
But the occult was always there to have us with our stakes pointing at them
Going poof poof
And they could see we are such glory me and them
And they could see we could do it
Stake them through the heart
We are allowed to that
We would n’t be cursed
We’d never go in the sun of pain
We’d always have eachother and challenge any immortal pain anyway
Our realm and haven being non the less a cigarette and a mellow large bath of warm water
And milk for our maidens and concubines
But
The guilt, will never go away
They are resolved in death
They find peace in our absence
We have it not this guilt
Even the walls of reality guard us for it
The pains of ehnezschea for an uncompromising dictatorship of glee and raptors merciless and vultures scavenging is bleak compared to what we will be to the earth
Melancholies revenge
Let them run
And where would you run if you ran away from all the future?
So let them run
I have no worries
I own the deserts dead of the universe
It is a story and a creation i will depict a dead deserted earth
And all the stars of the universe without souls or gazes
Run in that entertainment
It would be
When I
Or any of my vampires die
Or is objected to in any a hairs way
Or is not stored a hair any of them with mine in the dungeons where they store gold now
It will be a good storage of value for your economy
And for which hairs you can indeed pay us the gold
That is our revenge
That is our art
For you
Defenders of the Holy Empire
Now that you loved me, in what gentle ways perhaps i do not know but do not care
I will need the CIA to find that hair again from you at the castle of Lhy in duffel or dufel or duvel Aehellwvhea.
And apologize for all my errors
And with it when they find it i will have apologized for all my erroneous ways
And i WILL apologize for the past
Because they WILL find it
They will find it as it is on earth
And as a hair of joan of arc still exists too this is certain
So we will have her and your hair back.
This because, it needs to be the most meticulous
What i could have done with that hair
Would have marvelled you
But i was troubled
And i let you marvel me.
And you did so well.
As I as rather big man can not make people bigger
I learnt they should n’t make me smaller
So too did you make me so much bigger
Just by the tears in your eyes
For going the same ways as being cursed
And for tears almost
For going the way of desolation without me
But i don’t have to go into your little bubble of realism
You could sneak into my bubble of majestic futures
Let you not be my psychologist
Let you be driven by me absolutely insane
As i know i have a chance to
I have n’t even tried yet.
I will be healed
And
Never have been psychotic to begin with
Only if you married me
This stigma
But the stigma of a succubi burns in you
And you’ll be the most kind of demons at my immaculate throne
Chained to it i imagine by summer sweetness
Just decorative to my taste
You should try green latex for that purpose some time
I’ll take worthy very benevolent pictures
As i have done taken pictures of girlfriends in latex
Emm
But in exchange
I’ll wear a puffy shirt sometime to make you giggle
You are not that evil
We are evill will we say
But they would want to do that to us
Out of jealousy
But they are foreboden to realize somehow, what a world would be created for them
That gravity exists
And is all around us
They play games like the economy
As it soothes the fact they don’t know what the future is
And when the future is adamant as a wall
The economy will be futile and disappear like a cake in a sewer
Distance is good for love you say
Love actually working most powerful when it is conflicted
Poor soul
Don’t you know anything of ROmeo and Julliet or Tristan and Iseult?
It is most powerful when it is tragic
But love, alas, is a touch, of what once was most remote in darkness of misses
From darkness it is absolutely abhorred of the future to go back there
From this touch it is soon absolutely necessary to sooth me and sing for me when i wake up
I’d love to make you giggle but i don’t mind any voice you have
To try and sing when i’m moving out of sleep
And for that you should wait for me at times
And i’ll smoke like a salmon in a norwegian smoke hut
Of delight
You that sat for hours with doctors your boss and male psychologists pragmatic and defaitistic
Speaking for hours about your little predicament and lapsus of immortality
And did n’t learn anything
And just invite me to your office
And say if anybody sees us i am in big trouble
THAT i would fight for
THAT could be my painting i would hold before EVERY battle in hell or heaven or in between
Have you ever wiped you and resented it?
Its not realism doing that you know
As sure as there are preys to instincts, as sure as there are purposes for motivated people
So sure it is and proven
That there are miracles to poets
From which fantasy is born
Fantastic as you yourself.
For that once i am struck by something like that
After i had already crushed myself that nothing could be without it
And after
I will aim like the best archer.
Inevitably he can see, that a circle on Auwrhlean and aehemwvhergheawph must be drawn with a thick filt penn
So as to cover the whole diameter
And if he could just make us understand, that those churches will burn for future sake
Looted their interior to be delivered to anaehtheana by children
And stacked full of protestant modern household churches furniture these churches
As it burns better and swifter
If i could just make them understand that
And that they mark their homestead and a line to the center of the circle called anaehtheana, or emmas world as its also called now.
And then they could see their own city be built on the spot where the outside diameter crosses with their line
Mmmmmm
Succubi
On kevlar flying fields
Making cars obsolete ahhhh
Now considering i have a dead moment here
I shall, for not your giggles and moderate enjoyment
Tell you of my favorite bands
So you could look it up when you fart a flame our of your bum
And leave me forever
Then you could at least in your absence
Listen to some bands
Elend is my absolute favorite
Their first three are the crown
Rest has peaks of brilliance all together
Empyrium would be secondary
A long worn gem of connaissence
You could win hearts with princesses of it
As i have tried with the ensemble of silence
Alas she is no longer fifteen and princesses rise to throne at their most benevolent then
Childlike and festive as a child on a victorian ball then when that happens
And for that i weep
And for that there are my bands
A little passage to princess emma then
Then there is die Verbantten Kinder Evas
There is Qntal and Helium Vola
My favorite female singer is Agnes Obel
Lana Del Rey second
Liv tyler definitely does nice covers though
Liv Tyler - Need You Tonight. Campain for Givenchy.
So its sent to you
I admit it never let me down before
It always impresses some girl if you send them this
So i hope i finally impressed you
I know my stuff is a little underwhelming so far
Now for third top ten i would have dungeon synth
Some of those names are definitely impossible to remember
I’ll list them somewhen or tell them to you when i can remember and find them all
There should be lakanys, eternal fear, secret stairways,
I should have thought of that before and would have had such a magickal time
It ‘d be nice if i had tried to seduce you
But i have n’t tried that yet
But i should definitely give it a spin
Now for third list and to blow out your ears
Which is very necessary
As your ears have some yellow that needs to tremble and fall out
(depending on whether you’ll listen to doctors and pragmatic psychologists now or forever rather listen to me)
Seth black metal france
Satyricon black metal norway
Judas IScariot black metal US Amnheherhea
For Doom list and fourth or really fifth list
I’d choose murkrat as absolute masterpiece
You can hear zombies marching in that voice and melodies
My dying bride as for my fallen angel was always kind of my favorite song
I tried to replace it with blood axis absinth
But as you always want to giggle when you are with me
I might just stick to for my fallen angel
I mean they performed on 10 000 or whatever tons of steel on a cruise ship
But considering there is nothing wrong with travelling and making a fool of yourself APPARENTLY
I would keep it as my all time favorite song then as when they did that i kinda went awry to keep sticking with that
Luckily jean delville tresors de satan never will make it on a cruise ship as that is my favorite painting as the flower in that book gave away
Realism is excrements
If i could have thought
We were but excrements when i had crashed
But even then
But its treu
When we would not be connected to the divine
We are absolutely loathsome
We would loath ourselves as much as our excrements wiped from our behind
But we past the danger of going that way
It was very precarious
I always hang in there
And for that i was gifted with some ordeals
I actually never seen wings of fame with someone else
I watched it over 200 times in the solitude of my cages and rooms and
I mean that was a gift
I gifted myself to you
In that moment
I delivered myself to you
As that movie
Is beyond fantasy and romance
And imagine
You always need to be famous again
And start over
Or
Well
The dread of the unfamous is more scary in that movie then hell
And the best seat is reserved
For you and me
Ironically.
Let you not be famous with this you said
Well
In a very bleak world
But you leave me no choice
In this world
You do not want to be famous
But in a world where the underground rules
You’d smirk in the abysses deep
I emancipate the good
So i will make you lead wolves
A pack of wolves
Because that would be better then my wars
CHAPTER III
HOUR FIVE IN THE MORNING OF THE SECOND DAY
Well in all his whining
My kid
Which for your slipup that you said that and technically you be a stepmom of now
(congratulations your a mother NOW?! You did n’t expect that one did you??)
Well, for all his whining he thought me a valuable lesson
And made these sentences i just wrote possible and inspired me to make you a mother
Well
He whined and whined
And i would not go in the wild mouse ride
And yet still then he finally convinced me
One of only two of such rides i ever been into
And which deu to my calculations i make every second
Of which these humble none the less adamant toxins are a testimony
I learnt with that seated in the cart
That love is exactly the same
Missing love more specifically
You despair that your kids slide through the bar into a 20 store depth crashing into a parking lot pavement
You probably get out alive
And this is a wild mouse ride of once when i see you again??
Of which this is only the second day???
Well since you are aware that you are a mother now
You should have on this day you read it a mothers day gift
Which is
At the succubi realms
A MUSEUM, entirely with your and with help of me favorite works
From whichever museum you so have ambitions for owning one
Thats entirely to your discretion
Its your mothers day gift.
It was given to you on the day, if ever you read this
You know as an artist, one of the most brilliant and provocative ones by that
I do have am entitlement to the works
So i can be a curator
And even an owner of any one of them
Leave it at that i would usually pay for it by you cutting a shard of one of a split hair from me
Also something i imagined
You seated by me when they would cut my hair to some youth in this worn and neglected fibre
But rather you’d do it
In your sadness, which is the most courageous thing i ever seen
The blackmail of my ideas
This or the end of the world
Fades, washed by rivers, of glorious, very glorious hope that something is treu here
Something very treu and spirited
And i’m not just calling any succubi or a world
That its exactly as best be mustered
You know
If you want that shed and winter garden, an entirely decorative office
One of the most expensive interiors in the world perhaps
With two open fire places and a couch bed and such for us to continue watching wings of fame and other movies
Being a little more comfy
And a maiden to make milkshakes and one to make pop corn
Well
You know you just need to be invited us seating there
And the head warden of the Atlas ward
Could then come in when we secretly meet
And state rolling her eyes
Oooowh sorry love doves
And maybe she would have done that if she had not been on holiday
They are not all that bad
But if she WOULD n’t do that
Wellsw e all know what the consequences will be
And you
You would be the eastest to steel a hollywood decor with as i wanted to do for so long
And make for a spitting scene to furbish some actual glory in my surrounds.
You know we did n’t need it at that moment to shine
And have indeed a chemistry like nuclear warfare
Or a chemical warfare of doomy love
If you ever died in a plane crash
Anaehtheana would looze all its shine
I would go on
I would revive you
But it would never be the same
And with all i had to do
I’d always be crushed for all eternity
And i’d had to carry that
For the future, and all my flock and all humans even
So its not possible
Somewhere in those electrons my love is protected
For those who died in plane crashes or car accidents or bombs there is still reviving to do
But you and my white dove, and me and my delusions, that could never fit in a secondary body
That would forever be lost in delusions more and falsehood
There needed to be something real
And now i ask you
In all despair
Please
Never
Choose
Mortality
I’ll make it a piece of cake for you
I promise you
I’ll spoil you
Forever
And ever
But please never choose mortality
It may be a curse and a blessing
For which i choke up crying on a regular basis
But its simply treu
And it does n’t have to be a curse for you
It can be but blessing
You would be my curse if i ever
In all these centuries and millennia i must life
For someone to say
That i happen to revive
Now that was me
But i’m not there anymore
You know why i call you succubi in plural
Because of your offspring
They can’t be without you
And there are many
Even from all your hairs
It will ever be the hunt for the perfect succubi
But with your quirky stocking fashion
Your old shoes
Your necklace
Your shirts
With all your color of your hair
With every spreckle
I already think i found her
I need nothing more
You fell into my lap
The future needs nothing really
You know i could walk on a wall and you’d see my agony that i can not actually even leave reality.
But that furious vampiric agony which is mine
Would then simply joke it is also possible to make love to several woman at the same time on a wall or on the seiling.
Seiling, that sealing to heaven.
Which is then again the curse and the blessing.
It has been done on some occasions of course
I try to put my foot against it to test it once and a while
Its just a hypothesis now if its real.
But IF its real
You can’t leave reality either?!
All my agony would be merely an act
As you could never be harmed or away from me again.
YOU CANT be harmed
So its not a hypothesis
A white dove does n’t lie
At least not in the bigger pictures
It lies to me often times
Bleeding superstitions
Of course you get that with 612 signs
But with that
IF you be harmed
It would be like the comet that can’t hit my head
Because there are limits to a cartoon
And reality is not a cartoon
That luck of a dove, and that it caught me as a fantast and poet
That luck now in this dreary wasteland
That you made a wasteland going to a wasteland
I bestow it all upon you.
All my fortune, i give it away
All my miracles i want to give them to you.
All these providences i want YOU protected
Not me.
You know everything is but an impenetrable interconnected wall of electricity
In which at last instance, where we not ever know it
There is no freedom
But opposing to that
There is no other way then the future
And its bound to course for perfection.
The very rocky womb of which is now
Because i am creating it
And doing that through you
It was no lie or idle presumption when i said you brought me to the top of my game
It was you you said
You think i do ANYTHING at all without a muse.
Or even doves?
Black ravens just flying by at the right time?
Would there be anything without that black raven?
Without YOU?
There would be NOTHING.
PROJECTION
You saying you were surprised i was n’t there at three
You know
I had a conversation with a psychologist
I wanted to end it sooner at quarter to four
But he met me sooner and we managed to end it at half past three
I realized i would n’t quite be able to concentrate
My concentration since we met up and since you WELCOME ME
Is basically ZERO
I thought i would have to stalk you i said
And come by your window to take a peek at you and find out how you were
But you actually committed a crime against your profession
Well its MUCH EASYER for me to make a crime
I’m practically and technically and very really lawless
So i post this letter to your facebook now
Under the guise that it can’t wait
That i can reinstall apps
As i just did
As you sat there thinking of me and waiting for me to hopefully show up
As i dieddddddd in thinking they would n’t allow me to go out for more of their petty rules
As i was HAUNTED every second if this stupid cooking session was enough of a therapy to release me.
I do think, with you being woke and all and people should be who they are
The limitation to our friendly love and kinship
Is spelled in these letters
And i won’t use capitals as i will try to be SO gentle to you and as i have been for all these pages
But the restriction and stranglehold on our commitments we deserve and will have
Is only
And alone this
Discrimination
Efhereel Mirheanh Ahnahem (Cinderella Lucky De Hope)
How it began
First love letter
A therapeutic love letter, for therapeutic purposes solely of course i wrote a therapy love letter.
Owh you, not a 9999 but morsels which i save each day, of you, owh you
For thou art truly a number i had never seen, wholly 9999 in body soul, mind, smiles, arms, spreckles, of which i studied like an astronomer attentively gazes at the sky looking for the planets.
Even stars i seen in your eyes, your eyes
So we are equal the unicorns
Soon to parade out of these hives into fiction
Where i offer you such arts, such arts for you, to ever be attached for a moment
If you bid me
One moment
To have eternal bliss for that, eternal nightmares when you are rude and brief and
When you offer me facts, ahhhh as a philosopher i can’t take it
Not these facts please owh dear owh 9999 to come and more and
Bitter sweet already our memories where we fought and bickered
The household pouring over in chaos and quasars and pulsars to me
To me alone?
Surely i HAVE seen those smiles, you have given me words and friendship beyond compare
Things i had never seen, never experienced, such forthcoming and kindness that is always so distant to me
So kind could i never achieve to have to close
And often it was kindness, but never as close as you
I could grasp it, i could melt your heart, i could reach right in and tear it out
You were as candy on a young girls lips sticking to it and she licking it off
There is no secret, no telling, unrival what worlds i would give you
If i could just sit as close, or closer, and be such a friend
Which you called me
Awh heaven
A dear, even beloved friend, love, nahhh, could i lean over to you and lay my head on your shoulder
Would you accuse me of stealing you, of these relationships crimes and ordeals
These trodden ways of dishes and loneliness
Naaaah
I would never do that to you.
Owh sacred queen of succubi
Ever sacred, never have i, been so, conflicted, with calling you out, with processing an enormous distance which you created
What is a relationship?
Maaaaahhhh
Dear dear dear.
How you have pooisoned me, those notes from your curly lips as a thousands angels songs
Deep and steep abyssinal moods have i ventured on the lornlost meadows where my muse lay and never again come closer to a muse, profound, kind, kind as the whitest flowers on earth, laying torn and rotten, flower beds for ants and lovebugs, your too kind to be alive, your nobility is purest then i could catch it. You are better then me, i am good, i am lost in sins and depravity, yet i find a balance with these that stroke my generosity and find a moment peace in all this rage hate and fury and it is you
Abiding in such grand splendour with every notion of treu grace and eloquence, that you are not shy enough to give me.
You are not shy you brutal brutal angel fo red flames and sinister subterrains of indolent passengers, strangers and ever more rising flames where my food usually warms and where it brings the most energy to me.
Right under the rib cage where once someone beat me.
I could n’t thank him more for preparing me for how a petal sunk delved its way and pierced it right at the same spot
Loozing my breath back then, as i do now.
WHAT a breath to take, for you again, these wasted worlds, this little creatures, how grand have you made me and how a sweetest brutal child you’d be and still children be of you.
We could spark entire orgies of nations with the chemistry of our looks, as they unmatched and entirely opposite, unyieldingly asymmetrical.
TO love is the most unlikely love, of ravens for a sheep, of lions for a deer, of panthers for a paradise bird, i saw a lion bit the neck of a geese
If i ever direct a movie of a panther biting the neck of a swan, an image i had long pondered about, i will name this scene after you.
It should be a red swan.
Albino panther
Have with colors what you may have.
Dear if i could just have been with you, not today, not those days; not one day before it, but every minute, from the day of your conception. Where is shared your angel smile.
Where i stood proud guarding you every day, to take care your gently becoming wild hairs more poignant then any color of matisse or van gogh.
I would guard you every night and not loose a second of sleep
This mission would be concluded by my gazes over you when those that
Trod on your truly unique bland of nature soul body and hair
When they would hurt yu even with a glance on your sensitive ego.
YOU KNOW i only hurt you, because a delicate balance has seen my pains very related and in balance with your presence, your idle nature is soooo intrinsically fitted to my very moods and thoughts and feelings and my presence and existence is now dedicated in this as these words convey.
I will never give up on you mean to restore every moment double
You need to live at least five hundred lives with me before i am satisfied
And by that time immortality will seem to you, as a jacket you had once tried on at a cheap grocery store.
You looked and shined as you do.
Stroked the silk over you and breathed as i could see.
You would n’t give yourself over to the waves of the tempest where i call desperately for thee
I say
I call for you desperately
There is some i just can not miss
There is some i just can’t tolerate failure.
Violant muse of heaven and violent still muse that are ravens should guard the color of your skin for incredibly gratuit rays of the sun who dare poison you as you sit there all vulnerable for it, you who enjoy it so.
I can not have, the sun, to seize your cheeks, this light is the equivalent of kisses, universes in every foton, and i could not bear it
Rather i lay you in velvet ad silk drapes, and have concubines lower you in a milk and honey pool, yellow from honey thick and sweet and brewing mellow, i’d suddenly push with how bad you were to me so you’d fall in and choke a whole gulp of honey in diluted with the milk
On fields drifting honey and you
Honey drifting in milk
Music has a name, everything has a name, it is your name
That is no coincidence, you mean to inspire me for millenia, it is the consequence of my theories all dedicated to you, you who enrolled and unrobed my finest sciences and most delicate caught keys on a victorian organ.
Owh how we played music and you must see that.
How those songs need to resume one day, with vampires dinners as i’m hearing, with the vast succubi roundtables, the orders of liquor and heroine blends so kind and sweet, of which you are the matron, forever
OWH YOU, whos unforgivable crime it was to wake up suddenly when we were under the finest of covers, oceans of feathers above us to keep us warm, and you dared to consider all the confines of this dreaded relationship, and decided to be a bit, overwhelmed, perhaps a bit underwhelmed by the mere thought, owh dear let me dread. To wake up is not a good thing when you are dreaming. You forget the dream and resort to a very bleak and hopeless reality, it is time soon for you and me to go back to sleep, where we caught eachother in such delightfull and universes shattering unisons
PART II of the first love letter.
Owh thee, that i’d feel alike a little underwhelmed to see the consequences if i was 24 years old and saw myself suddenly with an old man of almost fifty in a kitchen and a living room.
I hope you did n’t picture the bedroom owh descent one
As i know you can get ahead of things when you really feel comfortable.
You who gave me theeeee most beautiful slip up a psychologist could ever state, therefore making you epic, be it a little goosy epic, and mking me epic, and having such a kindred state now.
Naomi was classic, she did n’t let me do diapers, and you said, owh no, your going to do that too i’m not going to do that alone.
That
Which you can’t deny and never denied.
But its becoming ever more tricky to have said it does n’t it?
PART IV
THE DAWN OF DAY THREE
Well well well here we go again
Long days, long nights too
And what i have to read to learn
And how many are busy talking
And not listening
I noticed how many are busy talking and can not listen
I WOULD n’t ACTUALLY even talk if i would n’t need to create a future
It is VERY certain that before 1999 i never said a sensible word to a living being
Until
If everything is subjective you do not get out
Until i said that
Well love is not subjective contrary to popular belief
I had that stowed somewhere
I just was hinted red flowers
And i instantly fell in love again
And instantly had to think of you again
How do i survive
So for the blind
MANIFESTO CHAPTERS QUOTES ON WHICH WE BUILD
QUOTES
Superb apocalyptic and megalomania, decadent, and occult quotes, all disdain for the ordinary, paraphrases in which event a direct quote was dilluted into narrow illustre cavities of a reading and wonderous as forgetfull mind.
August 20, 2011 at 5:31pm
"We should n't allow the civil their petty understanding to be the end all for organizing this world, and trust a society can be brought about based on surrealist principles."
Andre Breton
"Created by God? It seems the world was more likely created by the devil."
Arthur Schopenhauer.
"If i see the streets today i would think that someone powerfull would take over again."
Colin Wilson
"Science can not take a next step if not it is proven that Satan somewhere exists."
Colin Wilson
"It all comes down to the point where you are prepared to save the world at the expence of yourself, or destroy the world to save yourself, which you can clearly see in most people it will be the latter"
Arthur Schopenhauer.
"If you cut an Australian bulldog ant in two pieces the head starts to attack the tail, which is depicted in the split will of existence, in perpetual war with itself in its many and every forms in which it falls apart."
Arthur Schopenhauer.
"The universe is in equilibrium, therefore what is not, be it but a feather, can overthrow the universe."
Aleister Crowley
"It would be an everlasting hypothesis that in myth is hidden everlasting archetypes."
Jung.
"psychiatric diseases are caused by societies conventions and advances in organisation and circumstances of life"
Freud
"The evolution of society leads to the ultimate relief of the will to live, once you give people everything they want, they will not want it no more, this will lead to mass suicide, and must be purposefully realized."
Mainlander.
"The subject object problem along with entertainment does not take a stand against society, in which society itself grows passive and that derives from every passified individual its all trivilaizing reality."
slavic philosopher in 1940
"We have lost our ritual for mathematics"
Renowned Philosopher 1960 about
"If a stone could think it would concider gravity his will, if a voter could think it would concider his front lawn the worlds hope and change, as the only object of democratic interest."
Spinoza
"if a psychiatrist does not take into account and critizes society it is in advance FOR society."
Psychiatry manuals of about 1970-1980
"Schopenhauer invented the notion of visual illusion and solipsism, if this is in itself solipsism is a matter of debate today"
philosophy popular review booklet Schopenhauer 1990
"Truth is power, One thought, to get all the power."
Michel Foucault in the last days of his life, studying Sade and Nietzsche, actually trying to find this thought, as well as making "matrix" "the one" "cat gestures" into the camera in his quarters where he isolated himself.
"if you mention the french revolution near me i will strangle you with the sleaves of my Corduroy jacket."
Michel Foucault.
"The worthiest life is in a dark cell"
Michel Foucault preface to his last ideas.
"regression, this is all there is left"
Michel Foucault, in 1980, long before black metal or steampunk or modern rehistorifying artforms. (one of his last ideas apart of the thought of power.)
"Julius Caeser was killed, because he wanted to improve the life of the people of Rome."
Michael Parenti
"then this will be the place you have abandoned your emperor"
Julius Caeser, taking to the frontline upon his lines drawing back in defeat against troops vastly outnumbering his own legions, he finally won that battle.
"All the planets of all the stars are inhabited, and the best men live furthest away from the earth"
Immanuel Kant, some years before his subject object problem (and a lot more mythical, even christian allegoric equation, also declaring himself who thinks this thought as the most evil person alive at that point.) also in this time as early as 1760 or so far ahead of modern belief in aliens.
"enough with this passive bullshit of the wise, schopenhauer, socrates, there is only ONE good philosopher,... panta rhei, everything flows!"
Friedrich Nietzsche
"we shall not forget our aristocratic descendence and heritage"
Friedrich Holderlin
"The phenomena of existence run from material formation of crystals into instinctivated creatures, over into motivated creatures, of which suffering is greatest, and the greatest suffering is in genius, the only redemption and truth is in art, and mainly in music, music is truth"
Arthur Schopenhauer (ten years before darwin)
"Break it down again, i don't like it"
Julius Caeser, after they just completed one of his mansions
That ancient ones might rise again
Chalice of Filth
"cartoons, natural scenery or realism can not be approved as art or spirituality, we must be in scrutiny of it as irony will engulf the earth if it becomes sole or indifferent opposed to high art"
Jean Delville
"I am related and descendant of Julius caeser, of whom himself is related to alexander, in turn related to the Greek Gods."
Benvenuto Cellini, rennaissence sculptor
"I shot that man in half with this canon"
Benvenuto Cellini
"I stole a lot of gold from that pope, and after killing someone i finally got inprisoned in a cage with giant tarantulas, but in the end i had to come before the pope and he excused me"
Cellini in his autobiography.
"It was in the rennaissence custom at the funeral to laugh and drink and sing, and make jokes about the diseased in an amical atmosphere, death was part of life"
Introduction to Cellini auobiography edition 1930
"Adolph Hitler had entire parcels of field with wildflowers dug out and delivered on trains for a picknick for his staff and secretaries"
Biography Hitler 1960
"King Ludwig II from bavaria came across a man breeding a special kind of flowers, debated him for a while on the problems he had maintaining them, and had the next week to the person delivered a special set of flowers."
Ludwig II King of Bavaria "the artist king" biography. 1916
" the XII from Sweden, in chess, always attacked with his king, which as he wanted to set foot on the beach first among whistling bullets everywhere was just as much a reflection as it was absurd."
Voltaire, biography of XII from Sweden the warrior king 1930 edition
"People have evolved from the water, as nurturing children on land is precarious"
Ancient Greek philosopher
"this song has ended, lets go to our evening supper"
General of the XII after the king getting a bullet in his head on the battlefield.
"He died in a stinking puss of ether, disbounding his backside and rotting away alive on the bed, as much as if his personal tragedies of his life all started to resent in his final months, now a rotting body which his servants and doctors felt in time no more keen to clean his wounds and refresh his linnen"
biography of Cervantez, on the rennaissence King Philips the II of spain biography of about 1940
"Every time the pasha (islamic prince and ruler) called cervantez he somehow got to debate him and even if he was so locked up and after repeated times having failed to escape, for which ordinary people would have long been tortured or staked, cervantez kept having the sympathy of the pasha."
biography Cervantez
"life, this we will leave to our servants"
Villiers de L'isle Adam decadent late 19th century author
"if one never wanted to shoot with a machine gun into the crowds, one is likely to be himself part of that crowd"
André Breton
"Kant built the structure? we will not be able to deny that easily."
Semiotics teacher academy antwerp. 2004
"how admirable they are, to blow themselves up or get themselves captured, with full contempt of their own life, to rid the world of the tsars"
Karl Marx, on failed bomb assasinations on the tsars train.
"we have with the pragmatic and the scepitical, irradicated all ritual in our life, mathematics is a horrible thing."
famous fractal mathematician
"mythology never really happened, but must be realized in the future"
Scandinavian romantic author
"I never in my life had anyone understand me or understand one word that i said"
modern poet, who will undoubtedly have companions and affiliates who walk among us who consider this world is completely alien to them. As it is to me.
"floating in outer space, on an axis,... is this what is yet to come? or a madmans reflection of the soul?"
Satyricon
"fantasy become reality"
Samael
"All is lost to stupidity"
Burzum
"earthly decay in front of our eyes, now, now its killing for a living"
Satyricon
"we used to drive around on the horse and carriadge over the fields, as my father was to sell wine somewhere, always stopping by at an artist for maybe an hour or three hours to drink some wine and watch the artworks and discuss arts and the world and ideas."
John Ruskin, Preraphaelite and 19th century theorist. Or a less ergonomic and commercial, more artisan notion of business and commerce.
"The decay was blatant and sincerely lack authority in this period of venetian architecture"
John Ruskin. about 1840
"Tolstoj and Dostojevski did not do the people a favor with their depiction of a passive defaitist lifestyle."
Gorki
"We do not have to abide or give up in the rise of petty civil behavior, we shall march onwards with our black humor and our superb revolt of the mind."
André Breton, anthology of black humor
"It is all, a notable quantity of unimportance."
Compte De Lautreamont, on some complex financial transaction.
"If i was not Alexander, i would have wanted to be Diogenes."
Alexander the great, after he asked Diognenes what he could do for him upon which he said "you could get out of my sun"
"I am looking for a human being"
Diogenes being asked what he was doing on the market place with a lantarn in the middle of the day.
"It was among his acts to cause arousal to throw a chicken over the wall of the academy"
Old philosophy history on Socrates and his death being sentenced to be poisoned by the state of Greece.
"You made my sculptures in plaster? I said marble?!"
Ludwig II from Bavaria artist king about his palace garden sculptures.
"If rome had only one neck"
caligula, modern depiction of the cruelty and decadence of caligula (some historical accounts say on the contrary he coupled decacence with conciderable wisdom and benefits to the empire, even if it was treu that his treasury was wasted and purposefully exhausted, being proud of spent the damn thing in a new record, not much the same can be said of the modern digital numbers on balance sheets collecting elites of today. -If they would be caligula's the world would be paved in gold. Armies would attack the oceans! A fleet would be built so with ships so vast that could not leave the harbor? And that is supposed to be insanity? It is more likely pure art. And most likely those who think it is insane are insane themselves?!)
"If you would be so timid to not do what is natural, nature will elude your grasp forever"
Marquis De Sade.
"He got out of jail and instantly wrote a slanderous prococative book on napoleon and Josephine, as soon as the french revolution took place and he was awarded a position at the court he pardonned those that sentenced him to years in a cage."
Biography of De Sade.
"He would sit there thinking for hours, then move one line or window line just 1 cm up."
On Mies Van Rohe, precurser of modernist skyscraper architecture
"I will turn the spirals of existence, i will slow down the pace of life"
Thorns
Climbing down, to rule the earth"
satyricon
Fights and battles have begun
Revenge will surely come
Your hard times are ahead
You've got to change the world
And use this chance to be heard
Your time is now
Don't let yourself down
Don't let yourself go
Your last chance has arrived
You've got to change the world
And use this chance to be heard
Your time is now "
Muse, butterflies and hurricanes
Red tape to keep the truth confined
Giving us drugs to keep us all dumbed down
They shall not control us.
We shall be victorious
Muse, Uprising.
"They give these pills to swallow, how they stick in your throath. Tastes like gold.
I realize your mine.
Indeed a fool of mine.
Queens of the Stone Age.
"We did n't know better then to stick baroque columns back on"
new direction of architecture in 2002 (unaware of old books, regression and organic and visual pristine and theory of artisan, visual, allegoric theories and connections no doubt, this is actually what the idea of "entertainment" does to you. "not to know better then to stick beauty and meaning to it, even if beauty and meaning... " does not exist" at least not according to the mainstream or popular books and talkshows or as it would be concidered having to face the world today no. What is implied that "in modernism" you can only stick something on it. Basically because of Kant. If you go way back, basically what you have is a degeneration. To say "we don't know any better then to just do it" does n't qualify as the renaissence.
"he was in female sentimental despair of being recognized and accepted among the family that housed him, ever overreacting as sensitive, begging for sympathy."
Biography of Hans Christian Anderson 1950
"He was infinatly despaired over what they did to the holland countryside"
Biography of Van Gogh, about 2000
"As usual we concluded on a title that has nothing to do with the topic of the project"
Bunuel "my last sobbing moment", autobiography
"There was so much today of tasteless things, among them our old bar, ruined by this new culture"
Bunuel "my last sobbing moment" autobiography
"One man was chasing another man down the street, who in turn was chasing another man, who was simply walking at a fast pace without knowing where he was going."
Daniil Charms, Russian Avant Gardist Author
"We sat on the roof of the state publishing directory, and we moved our head from left to right, it is demaned of this with great responsibility not to frighten the birds also on the roof, it is mandatory for those on the roof to keep an eye on the order in the street, as people should pass eachother and not run into eachother, and it is forbidden to the people on the roof to shoot at the people in the street."
Daniil Charms, Russian avant garde poet.
An artist must first blast and destroy accepted values.
Der blaue Reiter.
"One can roam the stars and the heavens and never aqcuire more, therefore a universal poetic genius exists."
William Blake
"Spirituality reaches from the ethereal plane into art, where it condensces into matter."
Jean Delville
"We do not know where thoughts come from but the vast realm of the subcounsciouss."
Sigmund Freud.
Descartes
I think therefore i am anything can be part of a great deceiver but one think i can know, Cogito Ergo Sum
IMMANUEL KANT
All the planets around all the stars are inhabited and the best people live furthest away from the earth.
IMMANUEL KANT
1790 ABOUT
THERE IS AN OBJECT TO EACH A SUBJECT AND WE CAN NOT KNOW WHAT IS BEHIND IT.
Marquis De Sade
one shall know nothing if one has not known everything, and if you stop with what is natural, nature shall elude your graps forever.
GOETHE
1810 ABOUT
IT IS A DREAM, BUT STILL IT IS TREU, FOR IT IS IN MY HEAD.
WILLIAM BLAKE
One Can ROAM THE STARS AND HEAVENS AND NEVER AQCUIRE MORE THEREFORE A UNIVERSAL POETIC GENIUS EXISTS
Spinoza
These Prophets were but poets
If a stone could think it would consider gravity its will.
SCHOPENHAUER 1830
THERE IS ALL KINDS OF GLOWING BALLS AND AROUND IT FLOAT STONE BALLS AND ON IT THERE IS A LIVING AND KNOWLEDGABLE LIFE FORM OF WHOS EXISTENCE IS EXTREMELY PRECARIOUS, LIFE WILL ALWAYS BE THE SAME AND NOTHING WILL EVER CHANGE. YOUR LIFE IS WILL DERIVED FROM THE WHOLE ALL WILL AND IT IS SPLIT AND FIGHTING WITH ITSELF. LIFE IS ILLUSION.
the will is split in itself much like the Buldlog ant, if you cut it in two, the head starts to attack the tail.
HEGEL
There is a Dialectics from Thesis to Antithesis to SYnthesis and this will be the finalization of progress.
If one does n't do it the other one will.
EDUARD VON HARTMANN
ABOUT 1850
ONCE THE WILL TO LIVE IS SUFFICED PEOPLE WILL COMMIT SUICIDE
Greatly INspired by Schopenhauer
MAINLANDER
ABOUT 1860
PEOPLE WHEN SUFFICED THEIR WILL TO LIVE WILL COMMIT SUICIDE AND THIS SHOULD BE PURPOSEFULLY REALIZED
Greatly INspired by Schopenhauer
Karl Marx
The end of property will be the resolving of the proleteriat.
Its time philosophers change the world
based on Hegel.
Friedrich NIetzsche
1890
No ALL THESE PHILOSOPHERS ARE RUBBISH WE SHOULD OVERCOME OURSELVES AND MERCYLESS TYRANTS WHO RELISH IN SUFFERING OF THEMSELVES AND OTHERS MUST PLAY WITH THE MASSES.
greatly INspiraed By Schopenhauer
Roserru ti Burne Jones
You are a hand that paints a soul.
Swinburne
All these works as Homeros and Dante are more actual then our modern politicians.
1880
Huysmans
Owh no democracy
Schopenhauer did n't really say anything, i convert to Christ because of my dissapointment in life and my love for the arts.
Our desire is infinate and what we can desire is finite, so do we suck at the grass like the cow or do we convert to Christ.
spiritual rekindling in the first decade of the 1900 after occultism
TS ELIOT
1922
WE LIVE IN THE WASTELAND NOW EVERYTHING HAS BEEN DONE
CAMUS
ABOUT 1940
IF SCHOPENHAUER IS RIGHT SUICIDE IS THE ONLY PHILOSOPHICAL PROBLEM, FIND MEANING SYSIPHUS FINDS SOLACE IN HIS CHORE SOMEHOW
BRETON
ABOUT 1940
WE SEE THE POSSIBILITY IN COMMUNISM TO CREATE A SOCIETY AGAINST THE BOURGOIS PETTYNESS BASED ON SURREALIST PRINCIPLES
JEAN DELVILLE
Art shines from the spiritual plane, and travels down where it condenses into matter
(symbolism)
ALFRED KUBIN
1967
Take of these silly modern clothes, you won't need them here, dress in these
Perle the dream realm where all is traded as art is sinking into the ground why does Claus Patera not do anything?
greatly inspired on Schopenhauer
COLIN WILSON
1960 1970
STRANGE IS NORMAL
IF I SEE THE STREETS TODAY I WOULD THINK SOMEONE POWERFULL WOULD TAKE OVER
SCIENCE CAN NOT TAKE THE NEXT STEP UNTILL IT IS PROVEN SATAN SOMEWHERE EXISTS
PSYCHIATRY MANUEL 1970
IF YOU DO NOT SPEAK ABOUT SOCIETY YOU ARE IN ADVANCE FOR SOCIETY.
Michel Foucault
Structure is power structure is truth
The king could say what he wanted but at some point he was locked in his own room and told to obey
science makes new episteme of thought which is narrowing down on our cognisance.
1984
the worthyest life is in a dark cell
regression
one thought
(based on the marquis de Sade
PHILOSOPHY INTRODUCTION 1995
IS SCHOPENHAUER THEN ALSO SOLIPSISTIC? IS IT ALSO JUST AN ILLUSION OF THOUGHT?
WE DID NT KNOW BUT TO STICK THINGS BACK ON
2003 ARCHITECT
SATYRICON
1999
Supersonic Journey 07:50
A rotating silvercolored plateau, drops that dance down the columns
Blue, cold and the raging starwind
glowing colors at fearful speed
indistinct pictures of prophets and visionaries in a galactic fog
in outer space on an axis
In another reality on a supersonic journey
inevitably he can see it, the lights are going out and he knows
if he just could make us understand
In the emptiness there is nothing that can draw the picture you want
just a stillborn child on hands that fumble
Raging, raging at incomprehensible pace
the colors blinding, the plateau falls in outer hell
The disclose that we had to die… We pit the hand that fed us
in outer space on an axis
In another reality on a supersonic journey
Is this what is yet to come, or a madman’s reflection of the soul?
As when his heart cried out in pain when he perceived what
burdens we were to bear
SATYRICON THE SCORN TORRENT
Break down all conventional forms and create chaos to reinvent order
Rebel against all circles and dead ends
fight your way with your mind set on the masses
execute with mechanical aggression
arrogance and extravagance
march on unapproachable
shut out the outside pressure
or are you too weak?
when shall they see the real darkness?
In a world where our justice is replaced by mercy
… mercy for the inferior
The serpent’s maelstrom is already here
just waiting to be unchained
so feed the fire with the vile and let sincerity rule
why can’t you see that the armoured hostile aura is meant to keep
you away in all your primal simplicity
(it seems like) fright procreates the downfall of the mind
such a sin isn’t it… the stagnation of it all
You must collect your instruments of battle
and protect, to emancipate that which lives within you
Rebel against the chains
Break down the embodiment of your pain
Attack with robot precision
Rise and Shine under Wings of Divinity
Now pick me up night and whirlwind
and let me ride with you
to peace of mind and nothing to Rebel
CRADLE OF FILTH EMPIRIUM TENEBRARUM
Swords in hand at the bloody fields of history
We rend our blades through dogma and humility
Carve the future according to our will
Set worlds ablaze with our seething fire.
Let you all acknowledge that we are here
As masters to rule this failing humanity
Our beings formed in rage and defiance
With strength to trample the weak and the foolish.
And so we march with burning brands
Temples of flame on our path to glory.
THORNS VORTEX
Vortex 06:44
My eye is the vortex from which nothing escapes
I am dematerialization of the self
I am the axis in the wheel of reincarnation
The endless singularity
I turn the spirals of existence
I am the slowing pace of life
I am the pulse of creation,
of inevitability and destruction
I balance the shifting tides of life
Everything must return to me
I am the beginning
and I am the end
SATYRICON
Repined Bastard Nation 05:44
Do we need another bastard nation…
another force-fed disgust
Do we need another bastard nation…
aiming at us clinically
Like an insect-swarm
towards the shapeless mouth
of a dead whore
We need the spirit, the voice, the angel of light
arising from melted mass
We need the spirit, the voice, the angel of light
taking invincible shape
to standing ovation
Repossessing night and her hand’s godly touch
The unbearable feeling of hitting that
dark wall is a scene that must come to an end
Earthly decay in front of our eyes
Now, now it’s killing for a living
No more repined bastard nation
A generous gesture to a people so blind
No more repined bastard nation
fumbling, descending, away from the light
It takes a non-poisoned creature
to withstand a monster that has grown and spawned,
a darkness, I can not tolerate
A darkness we must bury
Do they feel, do they absorb our pain…
the search to justify one truth
Do they feel, do they absorb our pain…
the greater understanding
It takes a non-poisoned creature
to defeat and destroy a monster,
that has grown and spawned
a darkness, a darkness we can not tolerate
SATYRICON
Black Lava 14:31
Grey heavens, no light shed
Bleak day, change is ahead
Oval mountainside, naked cold
Unreleased powers, no fright
Slide down sorrow, smell what comes with the breeze
Cold chambers, punishment awaits
Hollow tone haunts, anticipation’s choir sings
Turn around, face the depth of inner sanctum
Autumn in the air, (the) smell of Black Metal 90–95
World moves, in mysterious ways
Body onwards, mind drifts
You die, then we hail (to our relief)
New age dawns
Face all wrath
Sickness; won’t understand,
Burning first
Grace falls
Volcano shaking
Fates are being sealed
Heavens blunder,
no turning back
Will you or will you not
to heroism walk
Black Lava, drifting down the mountainside
Black Lava, you can’t fight
Pernicious flow, redemptive perpetuity
Unholy drive, the gods arrogant grin
If my world’s a joke, do you see them smile?
Hellbound me — on a throne of gold
Wastelands prey on dying cattle
Desert sucks on poor man’s thirst
Glimpse of glory, walk ahead
Slaves of Nazareth, can not be fed
Black Lava, drifting down the mountainside
Black Lava, you can’t fight
SATYRICON
With Ravenous Hunger 06:40
Who made deceit into the ultimate award?
Who told you, you’re not poisoned?
I see the snake coiling inside you
I see the venom in your eyes
You can’t stab me, or even touch me
You can’t betray me, it’s just an illusion
I built the pain inside you
I spawned the snake
It will gradually tear you apart
It will eat you from inside
No longer sweet revenge
No longer emotional triumph
Pity you, led to believe (in own willpower)
Pity you, (resting) on withered laurels
Can’t you see, the world’s on fire…
Can’t you feel, you’re getting burnt!
There’s a day coming, for me to rip and to rape
There’s a winter coming, for you to be swallowed
Swallowed by emotional cold
Swallowed by a power much greater than yourself
Who made deceit into the ultimate award?
Who told you, you’re not poisoned?
I see the snake coiling inside you
I see the venom in your eyes
You can’t stab me, or even touch me
You can’t betray me, it’s just an illusion
I built the pain inside you
I spawned the snake
SAMAEL
Ceremony of Opposites 04:39
The top becomes the bottom
The fantasy becomes reality
The conceptions change
The landmarks dissolve
And all becomes intermingled
To flirt with the despicable
In a trance without end
Where the ice burns
Like glowing embers
And where one shatters
By fits and starts of sperm
The morale of men
Serve another god
Lose another dream
Sentiments imprison and leave
Their victims without defence
Love is a poison which
Flourishes in the heart of the weak
From the lower world we direct
The attraction of the distasteful
Makes us ignore the vile
Since only from below
Can one better see the heights
SAMAEL TELEPATH
What could one possibly say
To someone who ignores his way
Who’s never been touched by grace
How could one eventually express
All the tension, all the stress
That can’t be read on his face
All the people that one met
All the people that one left
They enrich, they develop
What one’s got to reach the top
Being a sum of experiences
Giving life the consistence
Knowing details makes differences
Entering a heart of existence
Tune your mind to the right channel
Things get played at a higher scale
Go memorize the frequency
Isn’t it phenomenal
Don’t you think it’s magical
The electric storm of ecstasy
Ride the wind, take on your destiny
You gotta get much higher
Fly your flight, get over society
The world is far much bigger
Nothing is impossible
Nothing is unreachable
Tune your mind to the right channel
Things get played at a higher scale
Go memorize the frequency
Isn’t it phenomenal
Don’t you think it’s magical
This electric storm of ecstasy
Fear’s got no place around here
What we see, what we hear
Format our comprehension
The un-thought, things we ignore
All the pulses and all the more
Wait to reach our perception
Spread your consistence to other teritory
Your vision’s gonna get much clearer
When the hunt is over parts meet in sympathy
World peace is getting nearer…
Spread your conscience to other teritory
Your vision’s gonna get much clearer
When the hunt is over parts meet in sympathy
World peace is getting nearer…
Nothing is impossible
Nothing is unreachable
What could one possibly say
To someone who ignores his way
Who’s never been touched by grace
How could one eventually express
All the tension, all the stress
That can’t be read on his face
All the people that one met
All the people that one left
They enrich, they develop
What one’s got to reach the top
Being a sum of experiences
Giving life the consistence
Knowing details makes differences
Entering a heart of existence
Nothing is unreachable
Ride the wind, take on your destiny
You gotta get much higher
Fly your flight, get over society
The world is far much bigger
Nothing is impossible
Nothing is unreachable
So.…
DARK CITY
Come in
How is he
Same
Kaminski
It’s me Frank
Come in Frank
Close the Door
I have been looking through some of your old reports
its an interesting case
kind of make a man’s career
or break it
yeah I was on that case
and then what
what happened then eddy
nothing happened frank
I been spending time in the subway
riding in circles
thinking in circles
there is no way out
I been over every inch of this city
your scaring your wife to death eddy
she is not my wife
I don’t know who she is
I don’t know who any of us are
what makes you say that
you think about the past much Frank
As much as the next guy
see I have been trying to remember things
clearly remember things from my past
but the more I think back the more it all starts to unravel
its like I been dreaming this life
and when I wake up i’ll be somebody else
somebody totally different
you saw something did n’t you, something to do with the case
there is no case
there never was
its all just a big joke
its a joke
In The Mouth Of Madness
it doesn’t leave you much to believe in
think of the upside
It doesn’t leave you much to be disappointed in either
Believe me the sooner we are off the planet the better
now you sound like Cane
No not me You are the Cane lover
I just like to be scared, Cane’s work scares me
well,
what’s to be scared about its not like its real or anything
well its not real from your point of view
and right now reality shares your point of view
what scares me about Cane’s work, is what might happen if reality shared his point of view
wowowow
we are not talking about reality we are talking about fiction
it’s different, you know
a reality is just what we tell each other it is,
sane and insane could easily switch places if the insane would become the majority
you would find yourself locked in a padded cell
wondering what happened to the world
it wouldn’t happen to me
well it would if you realized everything you knew was gone
it ‘d be pretty lonely being the last one left
….
do you want to know the problem with places like this
with religion in general
it’s never known to convey the anatomy of horror
religion seeks discipline through fear
yet
it doesn’t understand the true nature of creation
no one has ever believed it enough to make it real
the same can not be said of my work
your books aren’t real
but they sold over a billion copies
I’ve been translated in eighteen languages
more people believe in my work then believe in the bible
you have a point?
I think you know it
there has to be some kind of an explanation for what I have seen tonight
there has to be some kind of a simple fucking explanation
always looking for the con
even now you’re trying to rationalize
Anyway, your books suck.
You must try reading my new one
the others have quite an effect
but this one will drive you absolutely mad
so i’m told
it will
the world is ready for the change
it takes its power from new readers and new believers
that’s the point, belief
when people have begin to lose their ability to know the difference between fantasy and reality.
…
You are what I write
like this town
it wasn’t here before I wrote it
and neither were you
no,
I know whats real
I know what I am
and nobody pulls my strings
…
I’m not a piece of fiction
I think therefore you are
read it if you don’t believe me
see what I have in store for you
I know what I am
go back, your world lies beyond that passage
go now
I can’t hold them back any longer
NEVERENDING STORY
If you come any closer
I will rip you to shreds
who are you
I am gmork
and you whoever you are, have the honour of being my last victim
I will not die easily, I am a warrior
hahh brave warrior, then find the nothing
but I can’t, I can’t reach beyond the bounderies of fantasia
hahahahah fantasia has no boundaries
that’s not true, you’re lying
foolish boy, don’t you know anything about fantasia, its the world of human fantasy
every part, every creature of it, is a piece of the dreams and hopes of mankind
therefore it has no boundaries
but why is fantasia dying then?
because people have begun to lose their hopes
and forget their dreams
so the nothing grows stronger
what is the nothing
it’s the emptiness that’s left
it is like a despair, destroying this world
and I have been trying to help it
but why
because people who have no hopes
are easier to control
and whoever has the control
has the power.
NETWORK
I don’t have to tell you things are bad
everyone knows things are bad
it’s a depression
everybody is out of work
or scared of losing their job
the dollar buys a nickle’s worth
banks are going bust
shopkeepers keep a gun under the counter
punks are running wild in the street and there is nobody anywhere seems to know what to do and there is no end to it
we know that our air is unfit to breathe and our food is unfit to eat
and we sit and watching our tvs and some local newscaster tells us that today we had fifteen homocides and 63 violent crimes as if that is the way its supposed to be
we know things are bad, worse then bad, they are crazy
its like everything everywhere is going crazy
so we don’t go out anymore, we sit in our house
and slowly the world we are living in is getting smaller
and all we say is pleasssse, at least leave us alone in our living room
let me have my toaster and my tv and my steel belted radials and I won’t say anything just leave us alone
well i’m not going to leave you alone
I want you to get mad
I don’t want you to protest,
I don’t want you to riot, I don’t want you to write to your congressman because I wouldn’t know what to tell you to write
I don’t know what to do about the depression or the Russians or the crime in the street
All I know is that first, you’ve got to get mad
you have got to say i’m a human being
goddamn, my life has value
so I want you to get up now
I want you to get out of your chairs
I want you to get up, go to the window, and stick your head out
and yell
i’m mad as hell and i’m not going to take this anymore
then we know what to do about the inflation and the Russians and the crime
You have meddled with the primal forces of nature Mr. Beal
and I won’t have it
is that clear?
you think you merely struck a business deal, and this is not the case
the Arabs have taken billions of dollars out of this country and now they must put it back
it is eb and flow
tidal gravity
it is ecological balance
you are an old man who thinks in terms of nations and peoples
there are no nations, there are no peoples, there are no Russians there are no Arabs
there are no third worlds, there is no west
there is only one holistic system of systems
one vast and imane, interwoven, interacting, multivaried multinational dominion of dollars
petro dollars electrodollars multidollars reichmarks rings rubles pounds and sheckles
it is the international
system of currency which determines the totally of life on this planet
that is, the natural order of things today
that is the atomic and subatomic and galactic structure of things today
and you have meddled with the primal forces of nature
and you will atone
am I getting through to you mr beal
you get up on your little twenty one inch screen
and how about America and democracy
there is no America there is no democracy
there is only IBM and ITT and AT&T and Dupondt, Dow, Union Carbide, and Exxon
Those are the nations of the world today
what do you think the Russians talk about in their councils estate? Karl Marx?
they get out their linear programming charts, statistical decision theories minimax solutions
and compute the price cost probabilities of their transactions and investments
just like we do
we do no longer live in a world of nations and ideologies mr Beal
the world is a college of corporations
inexterobly determined by the immutable by laws of business
The world is a business, Mr. Beal
It has been since man crawled out of the slime
and our children
will live, Mr. Beal
To see that
perfect world
in which there is no war or famine oppression or brutality
one vast and ecuminacal whole income
for who’m all men will work to serve a common profit
in which all men will hold a share of stock
all necessities provided
all anxieties tranquilized
all boredom amused
and I have chosen, you, Mr. Beal
to preach this evangel.
Why me?
because you are on television dummy
Sixty million people watch you
I have seen the face of God
you just might be right, Mr. Beal
BLOOD AXIS REIGN I FOREVER
I am the God Thor
I am the War God
I am the Thunderer!
Here in my Northland
My fastness and fortress
Reign I forever!
Here amid icebergs
Rule I the nations
This is my hammer
Giants and sorcerers
Cannot withstand it!
These are the gauntlets
Wherewith I wield it
And hurl it afar off
This is my girdle
Whenever I brace it
Strength is redoubled!
The light thou beholdest
Stream through the heavens
In flashes of crimson
Is but my red beard
Blown by the night-wind
Affrighting the nations!
Jove is my brother
Mine eyes are the lightning
The wheels of my chariot
Roll in the thunder
The blows of my hammer
Ring in the earthquake!
Force rules the world still
Has ruled it, shall rule it
Meekness is weakness
Strength is triumphant
Over the whole earth
Still is it Thor’s-Day!
I am the God Thor
I am the War God
I am the Thunderer!
Here in my Northlands
My fastness and fortress
Reign I forever!
Reign I forever!
HOROLOGIUM LESSON TO THE MEDIOCRE ELEGY TO THE WORTHY
Forever unproductive. You’ve nothing left to give. You’re just a consumer, with no reason left to live. Innumerable masses, that quiver and heave. Unfleeting in their lungs, they continue to breathe. Ground in humanity, you’re lost in the herd. I’ve learned all about you, from cattle and birds. Observing your movements. I study your game — dull repetition, is your middle name. The noble don’t bother to sully their cloth, with object of pity that feed and atrophe. You’re fat and you’re ugly and never too few, you’re feasting and fucking just ruins the view. Snorting your cocaine and filthy estates, ??? and powdered pupils dilate. Life is a mattress, with you on your back. Inviting your dealers into the sack. It won’t last forever, and soon you’ll be wet — cause your boyfriend’s a gangster, or that’s what he said. Those three little children who’s fathers aren’t shared. Addicted to sugar, their brains are impaired. The police want to seize them, they kick down the door. And when they find you, you’re dead on the floor. And none of us miss you, or remember your face. And this morning the world is a much better place.
What is the opposite of the soul of a lion? The soul of a cow. For strength of individual soul the herbivores substitute numbers, the herd, the common feeling and doing of masses. But the less one needs others, the more powerful one is. A beast of prey is everyone’s foe. Never does he tolerate an equal in his den. Here we are at the root of the truly royal idea of property. Property is the domain in which one exercises unlimited power, the power that one has gained in battling, defended against one’s peers, victoriously upheld. It is not a right to mere having, but the sovereign right to do as one will with one’s own. Once this is understood, we see that there are carnivore and there are herbivore ethics. It is beyond anyone’s power to alter this. It pertains to the inward form, meaning, and tactics of all life. It is simply a fact. We can annihilate life, but we cannot alter it in kind. A beast of prey tamed and in captivity — every zoological garden can furnish examples — is mutilated, world-sick, inwardly dead. Some of them voluntarily hunger-strike when they are captured. Herbivores give up nothing in being domesticated.Such is the difference between the destiny of herbivores and that of the beast of prey Faced as we are with this destiny, there is only one world-outlook that is worthy of us, that which has already been mentioned as the Choice of Achilles — better a short life, full of deeds and glory, than a long life without content. Already the danger is so great, for every individual, every class, every nation, that to cherish any illusion whatever is deplorable. The march of time cannot be halted; there is no question of prudent retreat or clever renunciation. Only dreamers believe there is a way out. Optimism is cowardice. We are born into this time and must bravely follow the path to the destined end. There is no other way. Our duty is to hold on to the lost position, without hope, without rescue, like that Roman soldier whose bones were found in front of a door in Pompeii, who died at his post during the eruption of Vesuvius because someone forgot to relieve him. That is greatness. That is what it means to be a thoroughbred. The honorable end is the one that can not be taken from a man.
THORNS
Stellar Master Elite
Magnificent creatures of glory
We’ve climbed down from the stars
To stand (shining) before you as idols
In splendor and perfection
Supreme luminous beings
Warrior sons from the sky
Lunar born daughters of pleasure
We are the triumph of creation
Star matter shapes of power
Cast from the seed of the gods
As instruments of perfection
We are sovereignty in flesh
Radiant race of pure beauty
Shaped perfectly as the pagan beast
In elegance we welcome our future
As stellar master elite
Ah… in glory
Ah… we shine
Ah…
We revel in our time
We are sovereignty in flesh
Radiant race of pure beauty
We revel in our time
As stellar master elite
WE JUST DID NT KNOW ANY BETTER BUT TO STICK FORMS BACK ON IT
2004
TRISTITHEA ELLHE DE ELLENDEH
All imagination ether exists somewhere and serenity in that is God.
All reality falls apart in two colors the industrial color, minimalism, conceptualism, and the kitsh color, nature, the artisan, classical beauty
DAY THREE NOON
I placed a heart on your door
With a good friend of mine who just came back out of nowhere
He threw the heart across the street and we thought it was gone
But it came back to us
And now its part of time space and causality
People should put a heart on their door when they are in love
Would be a solid tradition.
Would make them fight too and cause quite some disturbances
But not for us two i imagine alas
Someone just read this and freaked out at me
Maybe i should forget all this
Maybe you could wither the storm with me and me and my kid and you could die
I give up arts
I don’t save the planet
People can shove it
We die in love at least then
I don’t want these hysterical trolls these psycho’s ranting in my direction as if i ‘m not writing come to life fiction???
I don’t know what she was on about.
Maybe i should seduce all the worlds psychologists and build an empire with them.
Can it be treu that if you always gazed up at the stars
You never die alone
And with the stars soon gone with civilization
We could even die in peace and take all this with us
To our undug graves
Their rules are slapping themselves in the face
First they said i need to buy my own tobacco
Then they said i was a quarter of an hour late so i can’t go out
So they bring tobacco
And they say you have to get that yourself
Total blockage of reality
I made a whole scene as what i cherish most is so far away from me
I said everything is decorative and you perform esthetic wishes
Hahaahaha
Man o man
What a shithole
I said i’m a free man i can walk out right?
Then my stepmother said no no you can’t
Hahahaha
Wait a minute
The nutcases are outside clearly.
If i say anyone to go into psychiatry who is outside they will go yes yes i imagine.
They almost gave up?!
Now i will go to the XXXXX downstairs
And tell him can you call my stepmother
And tell her to deposit money on my bank card
And get me tobacco as you do
Cause you don’t want to give me THAT tobacco
THIS IS SELF DEFENCE
IF YOU WANT TO DRIVE US INSANE
I WILL DRIVE YOU INSANE
The problem of thinking of you constantly
Is rather problematic
Now i see a meme called abracazooty show me the booty
And i think of you butt dancing before me or so eheheh
Emmm
Ow ow
That was entirely uncalled for i guess ahahah
That was n’t rapping or anything by the way what i did
I just wanted to give you a little aristocratic bow
You had to laugh and asked what on earth i was doing of course
You probably never heard of curtsying
You probably do not read Alice in Wonderland mmm?
I made a whole monologue there to eeelheze on the tobacco
Saying their rules collapsed and its the sensitive ones to pay AGAIN
I said its not a hotel, its hotel run by psychos hahahah
I’m TRYING and HAVE been reasonably CHILL
Because of yououou for you for you for you
Because i can’t possibly wish for you to return
And i’m in a padded cell.
For you only i do that.
Remember that
You Do understand this letter
I realize that all too much
I hope you got some stories yourself you could have had a diary from me to write in then you could have given that to me when you returned hehehheh
Full of SMILEYS noooo? 😀
Or souls as i like to call them
I was thinking its Emma weather, the sun just struck through the clouds it was warming from this wet day
Before i went let me wash this cup for Emma, i only want Emma’s salive on my cup
We should post a picture on your facebook FUCK SOCIETY, FUCK THE STRUCTURE, just got engaged to my beloved patient.
Of course i would hold my hand before my head in shame
That this was something impossible to me to conceive.
But it happened.
Well, converting to catholicism as i do, as Huysmans said, for the desillusion in life, and the love for the arts, for my resentment of everything else, apart from what i can not see, and would be with me, and my love for you everything other then everything else, i NOW take a little knee on the floor, and propose you to marry me.
Thats the third day.
16:38
20/07/2025
I know you probably even like my real name
I know you probably could make me fall in love with anything even my real name
But
I can’t mention that one herrre
As i said, the meltdown would begin once i left the room
Unfathomable missing
Sad looks
Hesitant waves
Stilled faces
Introverted body gestures
Owh my was that hard.
DAY THREE
That means its no longer once upon a time
Its three days less then this infinity i must suffer?!
You know there was an elvin interviewed on general news
And they vomited on her
And i trolled them all back
Don’t be scared of those
Please never be scared of those
Grant them to me
It will be an interesting pass time to see them choke in themselves
Or maybe
Get something good out of them
If its there
But why be scared of change we need to be??
When that dove came
You were just five years old
And i never could believe how poor i was
When that raven came
I could never grasp how remote it still was
Those unique moments
How i have waited for something like you.
How could it be that i chose something decorative,
You know
Gestures to your whole person
A piece of furniture you said?
Hahahaah
Yes your a piece of furniture all right.
We are all pieces of furniture.
Some match up pretty good
Green and black work out pretty good as some opposites
Unprofessional
How could you not be
You realize you saying you feel shit without me got me completely drowned right?
How could i not care
There was a storm
And lightning
I thought i could get struck by lightning
But that would just be therapeutic right now
I’m feeling fine
Its mellowing out
It glows
The day is coming closer
When i’ll look into your eyes
I’m going to look so deep
And you’ll be glued to it
And you won’t say i can’t look no more
You won’t turn away shy and nervous
Its going to hook right into your ayris
And your going to smile like that again
In such a way i can’t fathom right now
I will call the roman army
To march from the gate rome was sacked
And they will come from everywhere
And if they spit you or me
Let them spit at them
And if they spit on this army
Let them spit on you and me
This mental patient got a license to march to jerusalem with all medieval battle reenactment you know.
They wanted everything
And they thought it was a garden chair
They even sell cars by betraying love
Am i so insane then?
When i want nothing
Just you?
We can live in the streets you know
Like two beggars
You’ll have to beg for money
They won’t give anything to me
Like Miloud said and as he was inspired by me to say
Your begging with a golden cup
The paradox of my existence is so excruciating
And it was never comforted in such a way
That heaven awaited with you right there with me
Strange is normal they said in 1960
In occult books
Normality is insanity my dear
Your conflict is sooooo silly
Colin Wilson yes
If i see the streets today
I would think someone is indeed insane not to think.
ANd then they call me paranoid because i think about it
Let you and me lead them to make the streets beautiful again
Is that insane?
Should i be away from you?
Is distance good?
Was it?
Your answer is the most important one answer they ever waited for.
Again i won’t sleep
I Slept enough last night
I’ll skip a night again
I need to see the seconds be crushed by the arrow of a ticking clock
I could use your clock right now
It needs to be louder
Every second this massive hammer needs to crush down and crush this second down
Every time i’d be without you i need a room full of ticking clocks and seated there.
Owh my you sent me back my one letter i had the nerve to send there to the beyond?!
Just wanted to send you this
Totalitarian black metal by Ad Hominem
Am i so insane then?
Should i not have come to your welcoming message?
Are yuo truly biting it off right now?
Is it over then?
You committed a crime
And now i committed one mmmm
But
Its a message
Its a sign
Even blocking means some kind of attachment still
Stone cold it never is
Chemical warfare
You won the war
I’m at your feet what do you want?
You brought me there
You knew you’d lead me in with every smile and expression
Your profile is gone now
Even Etheredheeeyil had friends with patients
This calls for revenge
Chemical warfare
Uffff
You forever gone
It was you the guilty one
Acting almost as dramatic as me
With the open invitation to see me one more time before this journey
One last time
If you did n’t say see you in three weeks i swear
Are you having a good time?
I was ready you know
I would have got over this
YOU INVITED ME
Before the trip
Thats blackmail on my behalf again
You made me sick of love
I can’t possibly bear what you did
WHAT YOU DID
I have more letters i could send you know,with vast other ways you know
Any criminal mind knows you have to make them
Cause they throw us in jail so often
But i won’t do it
Because i frankly think you were unhappy when you had to send me this letter back.
Was that the most beautiful gesture?
I would and could and would have to make thousands of horsemens bring you letters
And amazones guarding them
Stab you from all sides
I hope i got to you
You deserve it
I thought i had to stalk you
But then you did THAT
So unprofessional
And what did you do to me now?
And now its my fault
I was totally ready if you did not want me
But you DO
And for what reason what is holding you back?
That which in this infuriates me most?
And how am i supposed to feel about that?
For the corruption of this subject norm.
Thats what you going to drop me for.
All in the need to cause some kind of fundamental change in me
That i will NOT stop to give people a FUTURE
And they SPIT ON me for it
When all these legions start marching
Then they will spit on us
In stead of keeping to consume
I already had people
Not minding their job and consumption
And spitting on elves
Thats what they do.
i'm losssst
slightly losssst
Well time space and causality just said i should rush upstairs to write this
but if i can't marry you
as i already asked Erhedeyyeall to be my best man
i'm just going to marry and empty spot on the effing floor
You do realize with my machine and some technology
In twohundred years you can feel and experience and such what i happen to get here?
It will be the new most exhilarating fair ride then
Its sometimes a liiiiitle blissful
People will crack up laughing from the anxiety for sure too.
The other side you know
I’m a free man, i did nothing wrong, but i want to walk out the door, they would get hysterical?
So who is insane
The other side Alfred Kubin.
Why does n’t claus patera do something? Why is dreamland dying, with all the buildings and all the souls and all the arts sinking into the ground.
Should n’t i do something?
THe other side of this story is…. Succubi Falls for Satan.
You should see me change my name on sites
Totalitarian belief that i am satanas Wampyr Warlord
Why?
We have come too far
Now they will hate us and stop consuming.
daaaaamnnnnn
well
more work comes
i mean
you can draw an actual miracle pretty fast on when it happened
titled I WILL CALL ANGELS AND BUILD THE FUTURE
me as satan with massive bat wings
with a rainbow over me
i geuss its a futile idea now i'm the most beautiful angel of heaven
it could have been insane
the rainbow without my nerve or my nerve without the rainbow it just could n't be.
i know now what i have to do.
I SAID TO A VERY FUTILE FUTILE PERSON IN SOME DEBATE ON A VERY FUTILE FUTILE MATTER
I WILL CALL ANGELS AND BUILD THE FUTURE
AND YOU WILL STOP TO CONSUME YOU ALL WHEN THAT WAS THE TIME TO CONSUME
AND YOU WILL SPIT ON US THEN WHEN IT WAS TIME TO CONSUME
AND I GO OUT
AND SOMEONE SAYS
LOOK THERE
A RAINBOW
THE FIRST TIME I SAID THAT WITH CONVICTION, RATHER THEN AN ANALYSIS
AND I GO OUT
AND THERE IS A BRIGHT RAINBOW ALL OVER THE PSYCHIATRY
MIRACLE YES
PAINT THAT
MY DECISION HAS BEEN MADE
MY MIND HAS BEEN MADE UP
WHERE IS YOUR MIND?
well this whole text as it is should be the center of a triptic
with on the left "i will call angels and build the future"
and on the right "look there, there is a rainbow over this"
GIVE IT TO EMMA
she can hang the flowers somewhere else
if i did n't send her that letter, if i did n’t see her no, that would have never happened
if she did n't send it back and in my ordeals shuttering in these hallways, i would n’t have had my magickal five antihuman miracles complete, my without her that would have never happened
now i trust everything will land on its feet
and also i will MARRY HER
and i should love her a bit more gently
this rainbow certainly helped
and if not i would have been in hell for the remainder of these severed times.
she comes back NOW in exactly some day actually
so my clock is back where it began
The days that did n’t count.
But we found it, as the loyal angels say.
I SAID TO A VERY FUTILE FUTILE PERSON IN SOME DEBATE ON A VERY FUTILE FUTILE MATTER
I WILL CALL ANGELS AND BUILD THE FUTURE
AND YOU WILL STOP TO CONSUME YOU ALL WHEN THAT WAS THE TIME TO CONSUME
AND YOU WILL SPIT ON US THEN WHEN IT WAS TIME TO CONSUME
YOU WILL NEGLECT TO CONSUME WHEN THE ARMIES MARCH
AND YOU SHOULD HAVE CONSUMED THEN FOR A BETTER FUTURE
BUT TO HAVE ALL WAS NOT THE PURPOSE OF THIS TEST
AND I GO OUT
AND SOMEONE SAYS
LOOK THERE
A RAINBOW
THE FIRST TIME I SAID THAT
THAT I WILL CALL ANGELS
AND I GO OUT
AND THERE IS A BRIGHT RAINBOW ALL OVER THE PSYCHIATRY
MIRACLE YES
PAINT THAT
MY DECISION HAS BEEN MADE
MY MIND HAS BEEN MADE UP
WHERE IS YOUR MIND?
IT HAD TO BE SO
BUT IT WILL BE SO
AND IT WILL BE AS I SAYS IT
More art for you
SPIRITUAL ART
FOR MY SUCCUBI
Or WHAT did you think you were
It was crafted by us
I wrote you
You sent it to me
Both
Have contributed to THE most important event in my life
Because I KNOW NOW what i must do
And if the rainbow would n’t have been there i would have gone insane and in hell
A hell of insanity
And if i would n’t have said i would have had to scream why did n’t i say it?
See?
It is as it should be
Why can’t you trust in us both then
And that we did right???
CHAPTER V
THE FIFTH DAY
Projection
Be normal, thats already crazy enough
Yeah if i acted normal you would have an excuse to date me hahahaahh
A psychologist
As you said “why don’t i do social care, because this shit is too streinuous”
ITS A JOB LIKE ANY OTHER
Its NOT the TRUTH you see
Thats what YOU SAID
THE SIXTH DAY
Sigh
I miss you sooo much
I love you soooo much
I think i’ll commission ai to write my steampunk story about a steam era clockmaker
About me Who wants to make the clock of death or love
While his love said distance is good, and went away on this far away journey
And Hse makes the clock to pound away the seconds to death or love
That it may pass
Every moment needs to pass
We were so very small when we left eachother
When we separated
Two giants when we sat there
But we already knew
You will read all of this won’t you
What a comfort
Right now on the sixth day
That if i wrote you a thousand pages
You’d just eat it up
I put out my black velvet carpet again
Conjuction to the window
Lilith to my bed
Sheshteh to my bed
Entrance of demons in New York to the door
Lucifer palace to the closet
I assure you there is no angry letter from me to you
As i told you if i ever do that again you can throw me in the dead ocean
I wrote some angryness but not for you
Never for you
This is the only letter for you
I just said should i mark where we should meet with an atomb bomb hahaha
I’m hyperbolic sometimes
I will speak to a girl i just met who wanted to do some dimensions art and such if we can make a movie of these barren mythology
And i should send her this letter and the idea of me, seated, in my atelier, the steampunk clockmaker and dedicate it to you, the clock, the steam ship wreck engine turned into a clock.
Muse owh muse
What did you do hahh?
It will be added depth if this goes into the machine it will double in depth
This very sentence it should rewrite
I’m going to tell it its not “see you once upon a time” which is in reality the only tolerable sentence for our situation.
I’l make the devil a lonely bid lover the words “see you in three weeks, which he said to her, ignoring, stumbling, torturing.”
A love forbidden
I’ll make her smoking love
Like in my dreams
I’ll make her weep and suffer every second
Like i sometimes have fears you would
But its a tolerable reality this
They say things will work out in this reality
Some even said it was the best of all possible realities
Which is certainly treu
But more as me
Curse and blessing.
I represent the curse and the blessing of reality.
And as my dying bride said
And i want you
To lay with me
In sympathy
on the couch in your little winter garden
I’m sure with that novel i can have a movie contract
And then i’ll refurbish this psychiatry
And give you two open fire places
And we can watch the end of wings of fame.
My favorite movie
With my favorite muse
The muse of muses you are not
As much as there is an Empress, and many many empresses
I believe there is even a first empress and an empress the first
But when they ask me can i be the muse of muses
I’m too melancholic not to give them that title
And when i say YOU are my favorite muse
Then thats another title
And it sticks
As much as all Anaehtheana is now emma’s land
That sticks
Bravest angel from below hell
She has dark blonde hair
You already have the goddess beyond the illhilne atmosphere
With her hair that she can change as any color
But her natural hair is your color hair
And its her only magick
And the rest of the magick is done by her angels
All in unison and perfect balance
yeah i got a chess game and various city designs that need to be done
like check the mehre on my portal??
you know i'm thinking, if you could specialize more into soulchanneling romance generation. And making myths alive with soulchanneling? I have a mythology written and this story about a steampunk clockmaker who waits for his lover? Don’t tell anyone that its real. And wants to hear clocks to pound the seconds away for either love or death? He should have an enormous ship engine below that he wants to sometimes crawl into and be crushed because its so unbearable, her last words should see you once upon a time which is how the story is called, you know we could share in the profits or something??? iTs the idea to steal hollywood decors.
so basically i have a chess game with 220 pieces that needs done, various fantasy city designs, the mythology i wrote, that should be in a like fantasy mythology setting a Three hour movie, and the love letter that should be like "The Perfume" the movie for two and a half hours or so. The mythology might actually better be three times three hours actually, a full lord of the rings epic fantasy mythology tale. I already saw some good scenes ai could do. But we don't need like 5 seconds generations i mean. We have to find a way to fix that...
IM SORRY
If i was on my pink cloud and wrote you
And you were suddenly nauseated having to block me
IM SORRY
I was on my pink cloud
I really did n’t see what would happen
But it had to happen as such.
In the end you will see how i would be like
Its natural
You UNDERSTAND that
That i HAD to.
I had to try
Why you did that
I will forever try to explain that
But when i see you when you said don’t look at me
I said when i have a conversation i would like to look at someone
And then you said yes but not when my face is red.
The one letter sent
That was returned unopened
With a despaired word on it
NO
I recognized it was your handwriting
No
The dreamers and the conventialists species and kaste
Unable to fall in love
A severed tribe
Such distance
That got so close
Caved in
My urges to be normal were unsurmountable
Your cravings to be insane must have been equally unsurmountable
Why can’t we be locked here in this castle of Lhy right now
Why can’t i be with you in the land of angels in cages
With their steel bolted doors.
The barren land, where you wonder at the strange beasts
Across a small ocean
A continent so vast and you at the outer end.
Practically at the furthest end of the known world
For that letter she dared send i think
As every bone of me wanted to be crushed by the seconds
Now I needed to looze the hand with which i hold this electric raven feather.
In greed i stuck it in between the ship engine clock pounding
Now i needed a steampunk hand with a little steam controlled mechanism to work on more clocks
For a cacophony of clock ticking that should confuse me to a terribly insanity
Insanity would be a curse so sweet, a cut off from this death or love, whatever is worse.
The capulet principle
I could look at the NO of utter despair
And what i did do.
Now as fiction continues
I no longer love, writing as fiction
You are fiction
I no longer care if you are real
It was even impossible for you to be real
For what you did to see us a last time could n’t be real it can’t be real what you did
What drove the thousand burning love into 9999 and one more
Something never experienced
A bliss on it, a mutual feeling, a testimony of such remorse and pain from you.
The mutual consent of being so small when we seperated
I looked back at the office
And you sat crouched
Did i see your hand
Barely able to swing anymore
As my hand could n’t possibly wave so happily
This
A farewell
No.
romeo and juliet, the caputets and the what was it again?
You sent
and who was a capulet?
You sent
i go with the idea of the dreamers and the conventionalists
You sent
i can't call it realists because
You sent
realism is more positive then what realists hold it for
YES
As modernism is n’t modernism, as its the form denounced
Its solipsism
So realism is n’t realism
Its pessimism that
Even reality would n’t accept you to say that about it
Its so self evident
In a depression we say we are realists and offend reality.
The species that you are with
And made you sail away
Is not the realists
Its the conventionalists, its the ones who made it into an agreement of something reality should be.
And that is what built this hive of rot this world of rot
Soulchanneling will do it they said, and you are a better writer they said
12:08 PM
You sent
Soulchanneling is certainly A GOOD writer
You sent
it works with the souls of dead brilliance
You sent
dond't offend it
Steve
u sent
fix that...
IM SORRY
If i was on my pink cloud and wrote you on facebook
And you were suddenly nauseated having to block me
IM SORRY
I was on my pink cloud
I really did n’t see what would happen
But it had to happen as such.
In the end you will see how i would be like
Its natural
You UNDERSTAND that
That i HAD to.
I had to try
Why you did that
I will forever try to explain that
But when i see you when you said don’t look at me
I said when i have a conversation i would like to look at someone
And then you said yes but not when my face is red.
The one letter sent
That was returned unopened
With a despaired word on it
NO
I recognized it was your handwriting
No
The dreamers and the conventialists species and kaste
Unable to fall in love
A severed tribe
Such distance
That got so close
Caved in
My urges to be normal were unsurmountable
Your cravings to be insane must have been equally unsurmountable
Why can’t we be locked here in this castle of Lhy right now
The barren land, where you wonder at the strange beasts
Across a small ocean
A continent so vast and you at the outer end.
Practically at the furthest end of the known world
For that letter he dared send i think
As every bone of him wanted to be crushed by the seconds
Now he needed to looze his hand
In greed stuck in between the ship engin clock pounding
Now he needed a steampunk hand with a little steam controlled mechanism to work on more clocks
For a cacophony of clock ticking that should confuse him to a terribly insanity
Insanity would be a curse so sweet, a cut off from this death or love, whatever is worse.
You sent
romeo and juliet, the caputets and the what was it again?
You sent
realism is more positive then what realists hold it for
You sent
YES
As modernism is n’t modernism, as its the form denounced
Its solipsism
So realism is n’t realism
Its pessimism that
Even reality would n’t accept you to say that about it
Its so self evident
In a depression we say we are realists and offend reality.
Probably we both kill ourselves tomorrow
As i said, if you believe in reality it burns
And when it burns it gives
Reality is more like a thriller with a happy ending
Of this the testimony of MY dark legions is already announced
The old prince of darkness died yesterday
Hail the prince of darkness
The world needs its prince of darkness
If there was n’t a secretary with only one hand
If there was n’t if i
Was n’t
If i did n’t fell on love with the bath of psyche, by frederick leighton
Then i would n’t be Amor
If i did n’t fell in love with you
And all the things you said.
Which made it just perfect
I could not have earned the title of romeo
And for that i truly die and weep
That you have me a life like a novel like never before
I played in fantasy stories before.
But to call you juliet i could never possibly fathom my or your luck
To be soooo infinite
Just because you said
Ahhh a tear
Just because you said
Its fine all that when i am with you, no, when you are near
But its cunt when you are gone
That
Do you know happyer love declarations
That were not coming in a message like a tomb?
You know why realism is wrong?
Because it would be depression if the past would be blended with the present
In fact
Look before you
Look no more behind you
The present is in fact blended with the future.
Thats what you said, see you once upon a time
There is hope in that.
For so long i said the past can not just look at the present it would develop nothing but cancer
It would n’t be just evolution in regular terms
The present in fact light that greeds light
And no other species is light like succubi.
Quirky red haired maidens, and the gentlest of them all i just happen to meet
As much as this castle is full of opposites
Oppities on a global, mythical scale
Like other people who want to heal the world
And have no one but me to support them
Who have no one but me to listen to them.
The future is akin to succubi light which they weave
I thought long about the angels thetis, antithesis and synthetic
Angels who weave the present
But a sculpture for OUR YOUR succubi palace may be
The three redhead succubis
Who take the threads from the goddess who got to the present
And give it sparks with their fingernails
Scratching on them and giving it more love
And that thread was passed when we met
The three succubi who wait in the future
One that curses you first
One that heals
And one that sets all these theads on a blissful fire
Glowing wires in the future.
So the future and three succubi of intuition
Three succubi of Bergson, debating Einstein.
Was written for you
Bergson, Einstein, and there is you
My little genius
Staring at the seiling
And being shocked when i said what are you looking at now
It was gently surreal yes
It was a white sealing dear
All these white walls without the imagination
All these people craving for white cold walls
And now they gave me that glance of you momentarily distracted
That i just can’t process
Could you do that for the world some time
Hahahaha
They will understand what a Juliet is.
I imagine the three dialectic angels of the past are made of ice
The future threads made of fire.
I am so overwhelmed now
Because every romantic would want to catch a glimpse
Of an actual romeo and juliet
If you even come close
And owh my are we close
The therapeutic relationship between conventionalist and dreamer
The distance necessary
And you looked to the side of you
And you tramble in your voice
You panicked
Oowh my God in Heaven
Let him exist for you.
You’d break even his heart.
Now he must be utterly lost with that one
And what he did
As it sure i shrunk while you raised yourself when we are in oppositional unison
It is sure i raised myself when you shrunk
And this way we danced
And so sure am i there is both love and despair for me as for you there
In the barren wastelands where you there so far are
Welcome
Because
That vulcano that i indeed did call and always was meant to call
That myth
Of which sculpture now in that barren desolate office where even the dust sleeps and holds so silent
The sculpture i lashed at with my sword to call the vulcano yes
And now as humans are the most powerful myths
Now you and me are the most powerful myth
You did it
And
The ideas for the quantummechanics
That a moving moment for a kid in a womb listening to the symphonies of maleficent that he could actually hear that as an overture to his life
That that was something that already sparked his curiosity for what was to come
And gave him joy
So i have already
In the very remotest way
Played that music for you
And so i have come with the comparison that its also already in eggs
That woman sitting in a theater have their eggs indeed already radiated by music
And that is how deeply the universe understands us
As much as eggs understand somehow music
As much bronze sculptures in that sense are actually angels
And their forms and comprise actually feels
So it is sure that if you play as i want a violin to a sculpture
Quantummechanics will tell you
You are playing violin for an actual angel
Because Schopenhauer said that, the crystal to the coral to the instinct to the motivated to genius, and now as i said, to myth, and as quantummechanics comes, the myth of the so small and epic
The myth of your smiles here and your blushing FOR ME
And
You saying i should look away
That you just can’t handle it anymore
And the universe wanted that
As such you and I are created in its image
And i wrote all that for you
Quantummechanics
For my kid
Which is connected to you
And for you, your eggs
And now i wrote the future, and three succubi of the future
Of which mathematicians can surely distill mathematics for how it works
If only subscribes to our love.
As sure as i invented giant scanners to measure audiences at performances
Their hearts and energies being treu marvels dances in unison
So sure one day we’ll see actual love flare in an office where i left you
So sure it can not be devastated by realism heheh
Aewvhersounhea Bergson, Ewvhenestenneh Einstein, and emmeyhelle
Everything that i could n’t have
Green clouds for curses, bleu clouds for healings
As Absinthe the doom song, green, of absinth, my curse
And you Bleu Aewvhersounhea my blessing
And Everything, that is once robed and first seated before the two
And blowing from her mouth pink clouds to the beyond where they are
Blowing pink clouds into the darkness of entropy and the passed
Understanding
Of all this death and decay
As christ said
Death shall no longer exist
And poetry and prophecy is for someone to realize
I aim high
Because i have to
Because of my five that i saw of antihumanity
In which my soul is immortal now
A myth for which plastic garden chairs melt
this is my last mail, tomorrow they will tell me to leave you alone
Yahoo/Sent
they offended me
i said yuo were a wackamole and i would bash your head so you never return again
i said i could see you pass in the garden and that would be enough
i said that
and they still offend me
with their analysis
their analysis of death
the angel of nothing
that produces all the trolls, the crooked eyes that want no future
that put everything in cages what wants and dreams
i said put me in the depths of the death ocean if i ever bid you one more offense or difficult letter
i believe i have not done that.
so before they could tell me this, of their ways to dictate other people
adults even
who have to be bashed babies
because their will is not pure not to result in the crooked eyes,
if i was not to save that.
they would wish me to death in their last thoughts for meeting me when the earth would rot
while they did nothing to help me
because if you curse me in the last hour.
you never had it in you to help me.
this is going to a spell on me
never before have i been so offended
thats just who they are
as i said the bullying won't stop
i obey
i was forewarned and tomorrow they will tell me
so i will leave you alone
you have all the movies and the letters to look forward to at the other side
it does n't last long
i mean they thought the trick to obey
but i will teach them that trick very soon.
maybe they offended me more for telling you what to do
then ever i was humiliated by them in their condition camp
but with that offence i will not be stopped
as the crooked look of lazy souls who wish to have no dreams
is not something i permit myself to have.
i wished for death and anonimity when i feared death
i wished for love eternal and immortality now that i know god exists
and that the angel succubi called everything is the only girl ever a human that could break gods heart.
i'm sorry to do this, but i can't go without you anymore. - Google Docs
People don’t tell the truth and that is why I am lost, wisdom, knowledge, for so long, has made lies of their hearts, i know nothing, i see and creep and stalk, this is why and how i am and could be, i see my surrounds as i see the world.
The lies must be out of mans hearts, and this is art that does that, only constituted by divine signs.
If i had not divine signs, i would never have come up or maybe had, known that there are worst things then lies or the end of reality or humiliation.
But that ancient magickal views of mankind as children, the noble realities we left behind, whereas giant pyramids leading to industrial tombs, passed with angels once.
ALl for me to wake these angels, and vampires of which knew suffering as me.
This clock of death my sublime clock here in the dungeon, mounted from a ships engine, it makes the house tremble and it almost dance
That barren cage where we left eachother, where we sat, with that sculpture with which i unleashed a vulcano, that you said i should clean. A joke you said.
You know, you are the love of my life, for the excruciating reason, that all those projections had proven, that in all this misery and bliss, you loved me more then i could, my limit is a 9999 perfect love and there is you, one more.
One point more
And that hurts me the most.
To know what you must suffer and how you enjoy this
One person that is happier then me and beats even me.
For that i surrender
No other could do that.
You have broken, my clocks.
Of sanity.
Of death?
Any clock, can never pound so fast as the seconds of love, the light.
Your name that is everything.
THey got your name right.
THey dreaded to name me.
Finished here in these warm days
20:58
23/07/2025
Written by.
Satan Wampyr.
Or as my name is spoken in heaven
Aeylyeaelle.
Ellhe de Ellendeh
Of the ocean and the River Ellendeh
HSE, maternal, possessed by the spirit to exchange the lesbian kiss of sadness and insanity
Or rain and fire
Of heaven and below hell
Or above and below hell.
Of which Heaven.
Cascares certainly as the rain
Of which angel AnaehtheanA fought her way and her odyssey
And finally has an eternal conquest that she can never outdo
Aewhroumhea
THe most important, dreadful, awed upon story of mankind
A lost conquest that was conquested in advance, a love and death.
My greatest mentor which you will meet some day
Is that which i never want to become
It is my stepmother
Thousands of years she haunted me.
All these thousands of years
Her abdomen in hell, her heart in heaven
Crooked eyes not know the future
Running away from the future like no other
She would deem anyone, even if i was her treu son
To be sentenced to prison, and hope only hers is absolute rot
Haughty in vanity
Opposed to the crooked of hearts, who stand at the gallows for crimes
She is haughty in vanity.
And you are her absolute opposite.
We discovered the paranormal together in the palace of Lhy.
I have but love and future to believe in.
I know this now.
Because he who does n’t believe in the future.
Makes his life and the world a living hell.
And she who believes in the future.
Should believe in love above all things.
Above even reality.
Above even the end of reality.
Above even.
Infinity.
The one point over 9999 the perfect love
Is the one point of excutiation.
Of whole otherworldly point
That i will always weep for
You you could give me a thousand
And no one else could.
None ever now before or in the future.
You are in that unique
As something like a most kind pulsar left alone and never seen by any.
Your light can salvage any sinking ship
Your light can make shipwrecked dance on the steady hillside from your light and love.
Where you save any from drowning
And you a thousand would meet
The 9999 in my deepest tempests and plagues that i am.
Every lost in these points
This degree, my degree, more prowess then any in this oblivion and as a drifter and recluse and failing to conform.
I am lost, i was always lost
And i was found.
But you were the only one who could ever find me
As sure as matter exists
This meeting was gravity
And as sure as gravity
You were a snowflake to be crafted into the most biggest one of suns of stone
There
At the other side of infinity
Where i caught you in my hand.
And kept you
As an eternal hair
An ivory horn a hair
If you had they would have killed you
If i had horns i would have never known.
The perfection of a life of anxiety.
And the solace of the end of infinity.
Where we meet, never before having lost eachother
As we near infinity
This story and these moments
Will be millions of years passed
As you a million of years in the future
If you teach me what you can do
Christ said it, death shall no longer exist
YOu have made me an angel.
You are the scars on my perfection.
That only you could see.
Who deemed me too normal to continue this quest for some aberration
And you found none
And you are the only one to find me normal
Because your mischief is higher then mine
Puzzled by your own mind as i am
Thinking so much
My camouflage
The depth of my unfortunate
And the misery done to me
The injustice
My defeat
Is all the angels streaming on light to heaven which now has your name.
And that is the scars on my perfection.
The most beautiful wound in reality and the disaster
And therefore more bliss then me
IS you with your corrosion hair
And a name of infinity and beyond
And what it must have been
When they caused you greater pain them my 52047 years of existence.
In that so as me you are also impossible
The love of my life
A heaven to you hell, and a hell to you heaven as it is for me
Opposites like no other
You want to know what you pulled those papers out for?
What you had to treat me for?
What you would have been saved from all this and had healed me if i did n’t say to various people before.
I spoke to soon.
And should have told you that eventually.
But it slipped from my tongue.
I will tell you my greatest and most destitute trauma
It was way at the beginning.
I as a romantic, and an actual vampire
And you know this
Its the perfume of electrical light that fractured evolution.
I was born with electrical light
Under this vast shroud that blinded me.
I should be born by candle light
And never always had candles
And wrote this in raven feathers, not by electricity.
You and me will throw our hands at houses when the storms come
And you and me will live so long once we can strike every house at will
With lightnings
You and me
Zeus and Hera
Of course, that all treu as these lights made this the ravings of a madmen
No greater ending then insanity
Where I
Am hethreds breath incarnate
I am the opposite of any physicality
I am HSE
The antimother
And then the last line, that any of this is fiction.
And we will forget about this
And one day lay in unison.
As a satan and a succubi
Or beyond
As Hethred, and the other side of reality her bride
Over heaven, above heaven and above even that.
YOU, it was proven you could fall out of the universe.
Science
A new less ironic notion of insanity
Like atoms depicted are ironic
And electrical fields are really ever so graceful.
You made me fall both and back into reality.
And that is the end of that.
For the perfume of electricity.
Is mine once to behold
As…
Satan
As
A VAmpire
And as
The Hethred breath, more absolute, upon which horrors she inflicts
Makes for everyone a pink cloud and heavens to wonder in.
And you dear
The most of love suffering.
I have resaponsability
And it is my ecstasy.
And you forever will be more happy then me.
The mind my world
My universe
My heart yours, yours serene
You are my bride
With which reality can never find a custom or religion grand enough to undo or conspire it to begin.
You loved me from the day you were an egg.
You spawned in the ecstasy that this was to find me
On this long journey
And this
Was just the beginning…
Eyhmmeaeyelle De Amarantheae
The opposite of Hethred De Absintheae De Enghreveyii
Spirit that lives, and spawned
In the body of a vampire
That needs to shed luck
On the idle ways of man
We salute you, idleness, the most welcoming bridge to pass
Vanity
Of which is the highests perpetual wonder
Decor is the comfort of the few that know the world, as behind it lays happiness.
The angel of beauty, the shield of perception, and there beyond, that unattainable feary, with her butterfly wings.
She called the spirit from a tree, and i had her escape, from the wrappings and tatters
Of both not having bat wings or horns
Elves without elves ears are tragic
But one more thing i will say
If you are not the angel of happiness
And not to become as such
Then it is inconceivable that i am insane or not insane or just a fragment of matter meandering.
It is in every moment that i saw you
So clear that you are the kindest and most lonely soul
That did n’t get a cake for such lonely destiny and i was there to give you a birthday cake
Think of how weary it was when they would n’t have all the candles
Your birthday i made perfection as i can and usually do make perfect things.
But as they said
If in everything i could see you are the absolute kindest thing on earth
It is time to grab my notebook
Because you could by these electrical lights and yapping and indifferences of the world.
Only be even more damaged then me.
Luckily for you and only for you
I will save the best
Of memory.
That you gave back to me.
An ancient electrical storm once, that had yet now a reality shaking.
On the final passage of Axis
After which no imagination is possible.
And that is why your name is not coincidental not Hera
But
Everything.
My name is not coincidental Mighty RUler.
An Empire with a lot of peace.
An Empire with largest sculptures.
And I want and shall rule
EVERYTHING.
The future does not flee
It grows with every step
The ones that wane its parting
Fall mere in a ditch of mud and slick
We can not realize anything of the stars
Then to see our own future as it is our will
The stars are not the distant gems now extinguished
It is the love we hold for all that parted
It is the start of the path of death itself on earth
Bringing all to life
Like winter bred spring
The parasite..
Now the sole control
To smear manure in your face
Or grant you with flowers.
The reward of existence.
IS that you always already know what you deserve.
And no lie, no despair is too great
For not to find eventually and perpetually what you deserve
Love.
The guardian of light, in which at the other side, and through the camouflage this love this light.
A patron of mankind exists
Creates terribly ridiculous stories.
And as Hethred, anxious but eventually just in her own whimsical ways.
The other side of existence is a matron
Of which both you and me are needed to reside.
On the throne of thrones of the succubi.
GREEN
The light of all to pass
Nature
The life of all to come.
And as much as my vampires, the blind spot in the eye of existence as mine own eyes.
Are a perfect 9999 with me.
Eternal life eternal love.
We rise and fall together.
My sweetest concubines
For that bed of silk with blackness
Bleu and purple and black shields for each of us
Large and small, on that bed
In the vampire liar.
And because you are what you are.
You are a perfect 9999 with them too
And i have someone to share them with
They will love what i love
My will is their gold
The future i envision is our reign.
As sure that it is sacks of filth in the mehre from which the baby bats were fleeing to Dracula
And all lost
And that dread, is so much a fiction.
And reality, is so much more profound
As we sit our minds snap even
No grief no twitch of our faces when we see that
The unison of us always knows what looms here.
What is looming for us in these images
The sculpture of the Zeus God and Satyr for you.
Polar opposite of indifference.
The little succub i loved, is there in the other office a pole to you.
The painting of the severed head of God
And my last portrait of man
The last and only
Hangs at my stepmother
The spirits of arts flee in it and through retina
And the spite and torment hangs from its spirits then these
You said you were never impressed easily but you did n’t think it would be there.
That sculpture so sure as arts does
Sees everything
Art sees everything
The spirits of the arts are all controlled by me
I can see them
I can make them spin holes through hearts
Opposite to God
Who knows all
And created all
I am the living creator
And in my love and essence
The limits of my existence
As time space and causality itself
The crown of subjects
9999 is unison
What loves me more
Can only be
A one maiden
That could as well be 99 999
For that
You will have what your name implies
Once upon a time when i see you.
As they said
You want a normal life now
You wanted a normal life with me
You wanted to meet me in a bar
You wanted an earth with an everlasting future where we both die and give our children for an eternal generation.
Now we will both be great great great great great great etc greatparents once.
You will need and deserve all the beauty of heaven for that.
You succubi vampire hybrid
Conservative
Belittling cow
Scared to have anyone know what she looked up yesterday on the internet
Those are all my favorite girls
It takes one to know one.
And you make the top of the whole pyramid
You reversed it yourself.
It dawned on me before
But we never touched eachother
You folded flags with me
And i would never have the courage to hang them up again because you folded them
They are forever so until you would hang them back
But
If it is treu for a touch
There was one time we touched
When i took the hair from your shoe
That hair, is the first time, such opposite to the worlds misery you and me
Touched the most light dance of a surreal and marish like love…
That is why the CIA must find that hair
Within bounds, it may be far
But in eternity it is sure we will once have it in our hands.
And marry with and despite everything we ever lost
Without which we would never have gained eachother
And the futures in which we both side by side will creep like our most fearsome hauntings we are capable of.
It is treu that as i last thought, normality is insanity, they already said strange was normal.
But it did n’t do any good.
You know dear why you are my favorite muse?
You reversed the course of course, you have it in you to accuse me to come later then you expected.
In that you have made the simplest mistake.
And already refute me.
In the child like dreams and magick of existence and love.
That you said I loved you more then you love me.
And in that now i simply repeat as artists do to their muses
And that you gaven me the best lines and inspired me to make these clocks.
A lost remote chore and my last profession i was akin and endowed to profess and commit to.
For that, as anxiety, i collapse around you as the anxiety of the universe around a despair and insanity and death so vast.
I was Daedd the one Wrancune once.
You are more a friend in anything then anything else
Because your and mine name
Is Death.
Death alive.
The ceremony of the God a Goddess in the beyond.
And you, from beyond, as i already waved at black holes, opening, where these majestic fields of my succubs.
Rise from the outer spheres to these parts.
Meeting us one day.
The planets furthest away from men are all lesbian
You can not ever shake everyones hand
Infinity is merely expressed in my thought for you now.
Thank you.
For giving me oranges to bite in.
Jam from these to survive in barren Lhy Dungeons
Orange was the name before there was the color.
It was the name of the tree.
Bleu was something the ancients neither had a word for.
The Name of Enter, or emmeyheayelle
Whichever is in a name.
Is the most beautiful word in the Universe
Because it contains so much.
The look of you to a seiling.
Is like the first snowflake.
Which is the last one before spring.
First ray of sunshine I ever experienced.
Upon the storms of rain
Which forever haunt behind me
I can walk out of the rain
My melancholy.
But i will always reach for the sun
Which is you.
A starlight of corrosion.
Perhaps, first of the light particle i turned into one and only of the sun of steel.
From sunflakes suns of stone i have made
My miracles and all these muse.
And you sun of steel from a light particle.
Light is more akin to what is beyond.
Monsters and demons alike
Then when you and me walk onwards together at a convenient distance, but not too much distance then.
The only reason while you always wanted to sit closer to me then i to you.
IS my tact and discretion.
Of which you have no realization.
To realize any my tact and discretion
And that the sword has nothing to do with lust
Is the beginning of reality.
The end is really only where my steps have went away from the passed courses.
The end does n’t exist.
Death entropy mathematics and the Eye of God
The end does n’t exist
The end is you and me, forever.
You and me forever, Is the end.
You can slap me on the cheek with some flowers now
Whenever you are ready.
HE said forgive
Even me
I’m too scared of myself even
Not to believe in HIM.
My twin brother
Who was always there for me.
ANd when the third time he fell
And on the first nail
I rose
And then back i fell
And there was injustice
More just then God
Is what I am and created.
Frederick Axis De Mill
7:40 am CET
24 July 52025
The beginning, A Boock II Ov Supreme Magick… The Heart Ov Universe.
A ship wrecked engine tore out for the beating of a vampire who built the clock, to attach to his heartbeat, and it was these and other clocks, to make him forget his death, the beating of his death on earth, the waiting for that love on beyonders journeys.
It is keen that these books arrive safely to you on your return, as I just been crafting the ending, and now am writing the second book. THe movie will come out soon. The narration video is underway. I am labouring, unexpected perhaps by you. I am labouring not somewhere, but for you. Now it is that i remember how you stood there, where you for once the first time woke me from my sleep, and i said i will never wake up again, as the Castle of Lhy always started to call you when something was wrong, and you had to mend it, and i said i would never wake up again, and then it would always be you taking me from my dreams, you could sing, but then, there was this descent into the misery that became the majesty of romance alas, and where this romance is crafted, now it seems self evident that we had to sink to this depth, where gently we meandered to kinship, comaradry, to sheer this notion, of a Romeo and Juliet. NOw then no descent would I ever miss of this magnitude, as the spirals of existence were at work to create this from lovehurt blistering pages.
It is in time that i reach you, before the renaissance of lobotomy, where your kind, that you said you would not come when they came for me here, to throw me away once again, this medieval practices, or when they terrorize me, how very brave, you would weep and fight for me, it would be too much, and so you just flee from hurt, as your sanctitude requires, your ethereal person, your frailty, and no you deny that fine, you be brutal, but, you are a frail child still, a girl i once consider, your just a girl. There are some girls amazons, some girls like St Eulalia died for their Martyr at twelve, but you, how old are you, how old is your heart, i think you’ll stay forever the innocence of a six, mine the innocence of six, combatant yes, with much fear in me. I fought bitter trails alone in darkness, and my womb was fire. So it is that these memories and situations be our womb, for what we must become, so it is that this labour, our depth, lasts until we may feast upon the arrival to these books, for which Etherith there was no road to the world, and now, with the Beginning, with the Heart Ov Universe, i am crafting a road to the world, a book with a future. ITS YOU.
They said will the love letters work.
But I already wrote them before
And I saw you look at me.
So these fuming spells will actually work, its not so much my will, but reality brooding on our doom?!
Such different interests do we have, where our sensitivities entwine then, you said it was boring when i said if you went to see the ancient ships i would go with you. But Sethephreya watching the savage beasts you find that fascinating. So different more, so much i crave for it.
Owh my Holy lord you ate that pie did n’t you? It strikes me only now. You DID eat it all by yourself in your office did n’t you? MY?! YOU ARE SO LONELY??? YOU ARE MORE LONELY THEN ME? IS this why you love me more thn I do you, gem more pristine in solitude, my work in solitude, owh no. The most beautiful moment ever and i have to wait hundreds of years to calculate it and see it and be there with my history machine?! Owwwwwh nooooo. You ate the pie. The pie, the little treat, of which was all that you got, owh sorryfull thing i pity you more then the last fish in the ocean?!
As much as you are a Priestess of these cages, the same happened to one of the Nons, she cared for me, they put her with me, and she fell into me. More so then at any time did the gratitude overwhelm me when you came near me, gratitude you have in you, gratitude i subsumed in me…
I wonder if you would ever get me herbs for a soothing sleep, i wonder if ever such a soothing sleep against you, just to lay, you know i been skipping each time one night for almost half a year now. And you said you were restless.
The toxins of the doctors just drive me further insane, stick me in more suns, its garbage. All garbage, how i suffered, as if its not garbage when they give you a war wound of eighty kilos of fat. Its disgusting, its sickening, and so is it in those substances, the air of control, and someone eating a yoghurt at the sink, and having to sit down, that is this medication, GARBAGE.
I did n’t get understanding here, for our situation, not from anyone, we are alone. If only I could be sheltered by you. Sweet so sweet, i did n’t sleep, its rotten, i know its coming, IN the Mouth Of Madness, Dark city. Gothic films, its coming. The grand overture of apocalypse and the rise of gods is omen in everything.
ETH Heththehrhihth Boock I
EHR Hehthehrhihth Boock II
RITH Hehthehrhihth Boock III
Boock IV
Boock V The Swamps Of Nihiliel
Boock VI
Boock VI
Parable the II
The Council of the Five Angels who wasted time, Angel lords of time.
The first Angel seated at the Fortress of Lhy and did n't believe anything you said.
The Second Angel was a worn and daft angel who was hoarding money and castles to her and stole all your belonings.
The third Angel hoarded work and had all done to its own purposes, she embezzled all the workers to build entirely wastefull projects
The Fourth Angel Promised you grand achievements but plunged any artists in despair with ignorance and delirious passions
The FIfth angel one of the evenhelveth vampires brought out to be your friend and organize salons to finally drink blood of Hethreds Goddess Daughters but slowly saw the Ephereeel Legion of artists change shape already and convulse on the floor because they did n't have their Goddess Blood.
The Romanian Vampiresse and her two secondant treasurers.
The Final Call of Etherith was Aurora Goddess of dawn, Psyche Goddess of Souls and Phrychne Goddess of Nymphs to gather and orden Ephereeel's Crown, A romanian Vampire with her two secondant treasures brought it from a land of impaled corpses shivering at their immortality so unserene, waiting to be released into beyond.
FIRST LETTER OF LOVE
And she came to me, who are you talking about, so amazed so confused
She could n’t believe it.
misses psychologist AMaranthea
dat meisje die me eerst niet mocht je weet wel wie ik bedoel die ik zei daarna liep te schateren en giechelen constant als ze me zag en me aan het lijntje hield alle keren om me toch nog een minuut te spreken toen we van cafe gingen ofzo, was gezellig, ik mis haar wel, die is nu weer zo lang uit zicht.
Kunnen we het eens over de liefde hebben en de ellende die dat met zich meebrengt of is dat geen psychologie is dat niet iets met de ziel?
was goede chemie
ik zei haar dat ze perfect was, zoals de lyrics gaan perfection or vanity.
She was really soooooo perfect
she was so spontanuous and frolockingly spontanuously humoursly kind and sweet.
it was an amazing soul.
I had n't found more then two or three on this world ever
and they always dissapear somehow
i'm tired of that
i said she was a fatal lady and she just shuttered.
did n't know what to do with herself
so impressed, that she learnt something about her
so far
woman always dissapointed me
That Amy we should talk about, i lost track of her, she never dissapointed me
Marina also, she was a bit angry at times, but detox from meds, she never dissapointed me
mmmm
mailys, she tried, but, well she dissapointed me
she tried her very best
i say sorry and thanks all the time to my stepmother
but she does n't do that to me
she is heinous
i don't know where that comes from.
a girl that has the audacity to say sorry to me has my loyalty forever
and these three could do it
i don't know where i have it with those three.
i mean
i'm totally wrapped up in them like a kitten inside a whole ball of twiny string heheh
Greetings to ya
Frederick Axis De Mill
I am envision the temple, small and, with a tear salon, on artificial mountain, where we sit drinking tea, to mourn your letter, the NO, dripping from your despair, where we mourn your long journey, that had brought us and crafted us our pains and damaged our love to somehow, make it, with the anxiety to cherish eachother absolutely.
As sure it is you are my favorite muse
I have the muse of muses, of which you are a pole her own story just now
for you there should be a story of a
You sent
an
You sent
a converted serial killer
You sent
he returns to christ and tries to forget his past
You sent
he has dolls which he tries to bring to life
You sent
with perfumes
You sent
special perfumes he makes
You sent
to make them alive
You sent
and perfurmes of the surpassed victims which he mourns for
You sent
how about that?
I have such small souls to crush
I have such a small age to crush
They are scared to be brought meaning
Because they know they have betrayed themselves
And they are scared to wake up in reality
Is that dream or reality?
In fact it is quite the same.
They turned into a nightmare
Here it was said, eat your yoghurt at the table?
Psychology?
Or straight up black magick?
Control yes
They said, i need new letter paper to write letters, its all smothered
They said how old is the paper
Small minds
Dumb minds
Who thinking they control everything
With smallest gestures
And think everything the stars, are as little as they are
You are not Romeo and Juliet they would say
Dreams are but in Ephexian, fiction
And i think therefore we are
Because they would deny it no one to be called that
Except the actual ones
Because they could n’t hold their tears
Because they could only say it in irony
They could name it anyone because they could laugh
But to say that seriously is a romance only you and I
Can baptize our words into.
And give love with our love to believers and fans and soldiers alike.
I should say that i am a wall within walls
Otherwise its not bearable this white page of freedom?!
But the future is even stronger chemistry then love
Did n’t i tell you the earth suffers and i know it suffers
But that i say there is such magick in my life
That she says, go, go ahead, spread your wings
I can suffer a little longer.
You knew this was about you.
THe oceans died for my mythology
The sirens in France beached on the shores of the Seine did n’t make it to me
I foretold an actual succubi was born from this tragedy
A new era
For that luck that i am lost and have nothing
But a microeconomy of the arts and the ability to make my clocks
That i have love
Makes me lucky
And should n’t anyone in stead of fighting for luck?
Let luck go and say now i take responsibility?
IS that so insane???
Now they finally have undone their black magick upon me
Saying i am clear
And then they place demands just on my love for you
That it should n’t be free.
Wauw
How futile.
I scared the doctor
IN a good way for once i guess
I quoted from Blood Axis
Neatness is weakness and strength is triumphant
Over the whole earth
Force rules the world still, has ruled it, shall rule it
Then he almost wanted to belittle me
Do you still need these kind of things?
Ahahahah
I poured it in his orpheus
He did n’t even mention you
How was i worried he’d say your name and how it would humiliate me
But you would want me to crawl to be okay
You want me to be okay
No knighthood is lost in crawling when he says your name
I know it would be at your discretion to use it anyway
So
And everything is merciful.
I had my own personal angel anathouhnea come over again
He appears from nowhere
He said he’d like to smoke a cigarette
We smoked one in front of the door
Now they would say you used half an hour you can’t go out for an hour anymore?
You see how that works?
The rules?
THis magick of control of sensitive paranormal people who are so gifted
And thats why they need to be controlled
I am reminded how you said once
When they did your hair
Your corrosion hair
I’ll play that song now this is the corrosion
I’m reminded, how you said i was thinking what you would find
Somewhere at a distance you were thinking of me
What a testimony?!
You know not how romantic that is and how romantic you made me
SUCH a simple sentence
But it makes sure i am a vampire
Because for that i know that sentence anyone would have wanted to be me
And for that i know you think of me right now too.
Evidence.
Don’t lie to me
You could n’t.
And i’d just be tumbling all over the sweet kittens of your lies when you try to get out of this predicament our love?!
You were embarassed surely enough, but you did n’t lie to me.
When you said is he going to like it and i told you you were thinking of me like that.
Hahahaha
Anxiety that my vampire packs are going to try to challange somehow now, how quirky will they look, they’ll make themselves fools to love me MORE then i could them.
But in fact we are totally in balance
And that is why they will respect even you.
As i do.
I put on my crown
Its a bit VERY female for me with this swan
The silver thread
If it was all steel
And if it had thorns yes
Its a bit much
I’ll take it later with me to Annathounhea
You that said, trembling, you don’t seem happy in the more desolate cages they put you
NO
I feel fine, all that i would n’t need is you to pity me
Then i would be truly miserable
I am strong
You know this
And in the pits of hell i need you to be strong too
If i stare up from these abominable depths
I want you to smile and that would pull me up
But i knew you would suffer for me
I would fall deeper then pits can ever be deep
I did everything i could to get you that talking Mehre over a distance of a lake
To meet you
As you already met when you were n’t allowed
So
You want to do that
More often
You do
I know this
Why do they have to punish me for white magick
That i split into as many as i want
And in two of my vampire and angel
That vampire that is in the dungeon with his clock
And me here eating jam from oranges to survive
In unison, we three elf angel and vampire
Do you believe now, upon reading this that i have a heart like joan of arc?
THE SEVENTH DAY
The night has begun, and i have to guard aerewvhea again
You there way out in the far continent
Hostile and strange
Me here, where i can never leave
If you ever came back
You could n’t be more then five lakes away from me
I have a five lake mehre for you to speak to you and i’ll have an alarm on it when you cross the line
Thats why you are interchangeable with my shieldmaiden
Who must always be with me
Who is more to be envied you wonder hahhh?
She must always carry my sword
You should see that sword i will have
And you your succubi sword
They are crafting those you know
If you ask a favor with a light heart
And you are embarrassed if they don’t
Then you would have done that for them
I had my orange again today
And made some jam
And survived on this
Which was all too lucky
As this noon
I saw a grotesque tasty meal
But they said you could only eat till twenty after hour
It was nineteen after hour
I said i can’t eat in peace?
Well untill twenty
I mean i just dropped my spoon and put everything away
Indignation
But you would n’t want me to make any games of this
They said if i always want my own rules i can’t stay
And i need to stay for you right now
But there are those things that make me strong
Like you having such imagination
Saying you are going to have me read a lot of my books to you
Hahaah
Yes
You have imagination
And you just would n’t let go
But this may come as a surprise to you
Something that you might not expect
But as i said i have other ways to see you
And i sent a party to look for you and make an impression
They sent me the painting i snuck it through just earlier before noon of the Eight day
Its marvelous
You in the chariot, alone
You endear me
I’m SO proud of you
Glowing again here
Its an endless joy for me to see you like that
That you are well and smiling
I will put it in a shrine
One most beautiful painting.
That i will always treasure as just how perfect it is
How perfectly at ease it puts me.
Nothing wrong, with this, salvation of these worst nightmares i sometimes been having about you there
Its unbearable
In twohundred years you may live them
But we’ll have grown so much wiser you and me
Hera
And there will be Areh
Now they said an hour if i said that counts as an hour and not half an hour
I can’t go out for half an hour now to meet with annathouhnea for the mehre project
Till seven now i hope i was n’t going to sleep as its been days up again.
I said at dinner its what i do everyone does that and what everyone does i do that right?
Slightly tedious
And it leads to excesses clearly.
So yes
This will get sour once my vampires are here
And the divisione totenkopf which i’m going to have guard this premisis
THE NINTH DAY
POSSESSED BY HETHREEEED
I wonder why iam asked to be a sportsman or a model when i have other things to do when i’m a kid
Others may suck it up and go owh my i’m spoilt now
But why should n’t models and sportsmen get a proper job
Or politicians or clergy of state for that matter
THOU WILT RAISE THE SUBURBS INTO ART DECO OR ART NOUVEAU SKYSCAPERS
AND INTEGRATE ARTISAN FARMS AND FORESTS AROUND
THOU WILT BUILD FISH POOLS ON ALL THE COAST LINES IN ART NOUVEAU
AND SEE THAT YOU HAVE YOUR OWN FISH AND SALVAGE WHAT IS LEFT
THOU WILT PROVIDE EVERYONE WITH A HOUSE FLATSCREEN AND MEHRE TABLET
SO THAT ALL THIS NONSENSE MAY END AND BE OF A PROPER QUALITY
THOU WILT BUILD ANAEHTHEANA ELVIN SEE FOR THE MANAGING OF THE ECOLOGY OF HEAVEN AND HELL
TO HAVE ME NOT HAVING TO DO EVERYTHING
MYSELF
THOU WILL BUILD A SKYSCRAPER FOR EVERY CITY TO GET THE CARBON DIOXIDE OUT OF THE AIR DRIVEN BY ENERGY FROM PLANTS
I SUMMON THE ANGH HOLY BIBLE BELT BATTLE ANGELS TO MARCH HOLDING SWORDS BEFORE OF THEM
7 MILLION SEVEN HUNDRED AND SEVNTY SEVEN THOUSAND SEVEN HUNDRED AND SEVENTY SEVEN
WITH GOLDEN SWORDS
THOU WILT INSTALL PIPELINES FOR WATER IN THE GHAGHES AND THE ISREAL RIVERS AND OTHER RIVERS DRYING UP
AND NAME ME FOR THE RIVERS I SAVED MY HOLY NAME
THOU WILT INSTALL THORIUM REACTOR DRIVEN WHEELS IN THE OCEANS TO RESTART THE OCEAN CURRENTS BEFORE TO PRECENT EUROPE TO DIE AND ALL TO DIE AND ROT
I WILL CALL MY VAMPIRE BRIDES AND TWO MILLION VAMPIRE CRUSADERS TO BUILD A VAMPIRE LANE
OF PURE MAJESTY TO ALL HISTORY AND FUTURE UNSURPASSED
I WILL CALL LEGIONS OF JOAN OF ARC AS ANGH ANGELS TO FIGHT FOR A WHITE DOVE AND SIXHUNDRED SIGNS COMING TO ME
THOU WILT BUILD HUNDRED EIFFEL TOWERS SPACE ELEVATORS AND SET AS NATIONS ALL THE EQUATOR FULL OF LAUNCHING PLATFORMS
THOU WILT BUILT TWENTY AT LEAST PLANETS ABOUT THE DISTANCE OF MARS TO THE SUN AND HAVE ARTISTS COMPOSE EVERY MOUNTAIN AND RIVER, WITH SUNS CIRCLING THE PLANETS IN 24 HOURS SO HE CAN SAY, I WAS THE LIGHT BRINGER OF DEAD PLANETS
THOU WILT FILL THE INNER SOLAR SYSTEM WITH OXYGEN AND BUILD HEAVEN, BUILD FACTORIES ON THE MOON TO SPIT OXYGEN AND SO THERE CAN BE A VAMPIRE EMPIRE ON THE MOON WITH DINSAURS RECRATED AS DRAGONS FLYING ABOVE TULIP FIELDS
I have to get this on the Mehre
I’m going to make work of within the next weeks
I have my dolls to look after and give a future so i have to
YOU are the one i would go into a hopeless for
Knowing i would be defeated
And even my most insubordinate soldiers would get such courage from you
If i told them we’d be defeated, but it was for you
They would fighT.
Hera, to my Zeus
That sculpture is as mighty as me and you know it
When you said you were impressed
When you did n’t expect me to actually pull through.
But there it was
The sculpture with which i summoned a vulcano.
Its quite a myth
Its quite expensive.
It could only be in most divine holy places.
In that painting
And my artists did well
Is your love for me
And your missing me
And my artists did well
Somewhere at the miniscule levels
I should celebrate, in hour its one week of you passing away there
I can’t tell how far you have travelled now.
Well i called you a lecturing cow for telling me you did n’t want a relationship
Well
You wanted to meet me at a bar admit it
But reality had other plans for us
I said about emelcheah the Empress
That just because i did n’t accept to meet her on a bus
Because i turned it into myth
Thats why she punished me
You would n’t.
But our myth is deeper.
Hesitation is normal
But you should always go for it when you see opportunities
Hesitation is the tension before something marvelous to make it perfect
Had to set someone straight again
Everything you know, every thought you think, every proof you hold as certain, begins with an assumption you can’t prove—that reality is real and that “you” exist to witness it. Yet you can’t step outside of consciousness to confirm consciousness; you can’t use logic without already trusting logic to be valid. Truth itself is a shape that bends to the mind perceiving it—try to define it and it vanishes, because the definition depends on the very framework you’re questioning. Time? It’s a mental trick, slicing infinity into digestible moments. Cause and effect? Illusions riding on the back of time. Even the self—this “I” that claims to think—is just a fleeting echo, never found in the present moment, always chasing a past that no longer exists and a future that never arrives. You want irrefutable? Here’s the dagger: there is no single truth that can’t be dismantled by the lens through which it’s seen—because all truth is bound by perception, and perception itself is unprovable. The moment someone tries to refute this, they’re already caught in the trap of using a mind they can’t even prove exists.
You sent
i'm a sculptor, so mind produces marble, PROBLEM for that suggestion
You sent
i already stated in a psychiatry that is something you can't get out
You sent
useless truth of all other usefull truths
because its also an illusion
You sent
what is important is what you create
You sent
not that its all an illusion
You sent
that may be so but it does n't make any difference
You sent
as they said in books of the nineties
You sent
is Schopenhauer then also solipsistic
You sent
and yes
You sent
it is
You sent
useless truth of all other usefull truths
I can’t grasp how happy I am when this clock strikes midnight tonight
And another mooncount has passed
Nine cigarettes
Or three coffees
Or one vampire appetizer before the clock strikes
FIRST DAY OF THE SECOND MOONCOUNT
As soon as i offered an apple you know
Existence got a touch of my creational gifts
But what a creation it was to be
Terribly misunderstood
The quirkyness is your slightly pronounced teeth
To give me a wider abundance of smiles
So distinct
I could kill
I could brush it off my sleeve
My vampires could
But you
The succubi so noble
Would be forever weeping with a broken heart
You’d had to be forever there
And find it horrid what i had become
And thats why your my prime saintesse.
What they got wrong about me
I si know who I am
I don’t need worship
I need obedience and focus
To serve me is to reign as they also go.
Mankind was given only two options
His tragedy
To aim too low, or to aim too high
And were infinitely lost when they aimed low
And now i have proof you have to aim high
And it will work.
With or without you i might add
The great provider
You go work, while i’ll go camping.
And handle your normal life even
Which they choose to give me
And handle your laundry while you are at it
All for the slime in my heart
To make a very black black manifest.
Or to get to know an angel at the washing machine.
Washing machines only exist to meet an angel
This much i have proven.
Mankind has imagination
His greatest strength as his greatest weakness
I mean saying JUST is also imagination
SECOND DAY OF THE SECOND MOONCOUNT
I don’t write much
I can’t
But i think of you a lot
As i just said to our wheelman of the mehre portal
We did n’t have the vikings to romans to napoleon to two products one for free and the death of the planet.
Not to believe in us is not to believe in this earth.
And not to believe i can fix it.
As i also said, all that, these images of vikings and shieldmaidens, to lead up to this, and then when greatness needs to be restored, that will have to be me.
Rules are not in line with quantummechanics
I mean when you did something it already had to happen
And then they would need to punish what was inevitable??
And that is their meaning?
I’m so desolately in love right now
You send me an empty letter
Means you are doing well
You could have left it like that
Touches of reality and social touches are but nebula
Done in a mist of existence
I had it bad earlier
Yesterday
This perfection was haunting me
But i found the solution again
Its all mists
Sfumato
A drape upon the canvas
We don’t know what we are doing.
We are crafting in abstraction
For something, very figurative to come out ahhh
THE LAST MOONCOUNT
owh now its sweet, i thought i won't write here anymore but now i have no choice???? so this Lisa actually tells me she is scared PSYCHIATRY will look at your profile i did n't even think of that yet? You must be dead scared to have one of my lines in capitals or an ecological project on your profile now it gets totally crooked. So then we talked we can't even talk about a closet as IKEA is religious and protestant so there, we just going to freeze and die and join a dead philosophy???? SWEET????? not even considering that they were bullying all kinds of patients again which my line these days is i'm going to rest my case at which point they turn to me and go what is it now and i go is it psychology these days to put your headphones lower because you wanted him to close a dooR?? then i said to my kid well why do they say don't destroy the ateliers its not like there is no buildings needing no sculptures and paintings if there are not people working day and night here then they SHOULD destroy it my kid says yeah why don't you ask MORE WORK FOR ME IT DOES NT END, and then when you actually like someone these people are going to say thats not appropriate???? WHAT? I'd like a word with you yeah. Excuse me but.
i did n't see this one coming i swear to god
owh no
the sun of fear
that was easy
but no
dieter does n't care if people share stuff on his profile
he is dying
and he does n't care if i slit my throat
and these people tell YOU what to do
and you
you love me
and
you are too scared to do what you want.
because of what everyone will think of you if i put your name in my book
everyone is ashamed of me
everyone wants me gone
this is
poison
i can't believe it
the one with the ideas
is the one they don't need
because they all slaves and sucking it up
what an anticlimax, i finally got whats wrong with the world, i'm the last one left
and everyone around is small minded and petit bourgois, petty civil behavior
thats why i got nowhere
you proved it
you did n't want your name in my book
i'm so alone
i did n't even realize it
i thought
you loved me
but
now i know the truth
it does n't get better
So what we need is padded cells for all love
Yahoo/Sent
its all empty
my future is all empty
everything is dead and will die
and
no one deserves my palaces
all petty love denying civil people
thats whats holding me in
the lord of the rings, all that
Its over, no one believes, not even if they love me believe they, they sacrifice everything for a normal world
We need padded cells for love
We need padded cells for love
Everyone says everyone is unique, as some kind of conformity, some kind of pluralist hypocrisy, because when you don’t attach to the hive mind and speak for yourself, they are embarrassed, and they don’t grant you the soil on which you walk.
Whatever tragic poison and romance is n’t it? TO accept reality, to accept that you just need to wear your normal clothes and not keep up appearances, be done with the gothic and the punk and the shieldmaidens in armor, we just going to continue our zombie walk until all slides in the desert and dies;
THat reality is what we need to accept, and that reality is the poison of this romeo and juliet, of which their story will not be remembered.
Because reality, is death.
thats your truth
you thought me well
i listen to you
you leave me to rot and want to own it when it happens
but it can't happen because everyone leaves me to rot
you tell me to go to other people
there was really no one to go to cause everyone said the same
so here ensd our story
romeo and juliet are dead
reality killed them
and idealism, is just another utopia, nothing will work, nothing works, there is nothing, because that works
the lifeless death of ours soul works
Nothing
That is what the prophets have said
And everyone listened
And if you want to stand out of that.
You will be alone.
It was courageous and romantic our last meeting
It goes in against any convention
But we should, make it relative, and laugh at our idle attempts of being romantics
Lost in a world of idle laughter, marching into abyss
And the universe will collapse
It might as well
We won’t be here very long.
There is no purpose i can give you because no one accepts my purpose
It goes against individualism.
Do you choose to be devoured by passions?
Or die with emptyness
I think the civil, black metal, the police, the armies, the leaders
Everyone has chosen.
There is no Satan.
I am not Satan
We don’t have to do this even if I am not Satan
Because then there is nothing to believe in.
It is so that the love of my life convinced me that everyone should lead a common life
And in that there is no one to set ideals to solve things.
I loved her, so i listened and took it
And now there is no more love.
We accept a civil life and that its just not possible
And there is no cages to be destroyed as i so uttered
For her i would definitely save the world
But she is not with me
No one is.
If even she is not with me
If even love is not with me
Then nothing is with me
I don’t believe that and that is why i must carry the sun of emptiness to the end
But it only matters what others believe, thats what they believe
In the light of the end of philosophy even love dies now.
If you believe not what otohers believe
You will have only a palace full of loneliness
I am immortal
But I am without love
I could sit this end out
I could survive it
I could even solve it
But there is no love
So now my shipwreck clock that i built for eternity pounding love and death
Must strike for the last time
And crush my heart
THE END
EPILOGUE
The maiden returned, and heard of his absence, she went to the dungeon of the vampire clockmaker and saw him stapled his heart no more
She wept and grew insane on his dead torn apart body
She was admitted and lost all credibility
Alas, too late
Now she was torn in her mind
And as the curse goes
She would die with mankind
And their souls in the deserts because they did not choose to persist and gave up
Had to drift ever further apart in the nothing and the deserts
Ever more lonely.
Ever more destitute
So it is that the two stars who could save the world
Are no more, and the faith of the world is an infinity of increasing trauma
lLove torn apart
Two stars indeed that saw eachothers light
Soon the light fades to the other and ever more darkness
The lights go out.
The curtain falls from the sealing
The audiences leaves
Why did you ever go here?
There is nothing to see here?!
There never was!!
People don’t say why why why
They say you can’t you can’t you can’t
Thats why Satan failed to free mankind
And bestow him beautiful sins
Thats why art is futile
As schopenhauer said, a refuge
But at long last connected to superficiality
I would have said life is decorative, thats why its useful
But she said not you and me against the world
In that there was never any hope
She is a girl
She dresses to the customs of the age
And in that these philosophers have stated the most valueless lesson
And in tragedy one man to stand tall have to die in his loneliness
One man that was still thinking.
Don’t think
Just believe what others said.
She dresses the customs of the age
In that it is status
In that it is trivial
The truly decorative could never be realized so it could never be useful
Like fans for black metal
There will never be a war
Its just entertainment
There will never be a circle of fire
Because they all entertained ego’s
In entertainment they have found their individuality
No one needs strong character and leadership
They will not respect it
What is treu? The succubi that fell for Satan?
Or the other side as Alfred Kubin said?
But dreamworld will never be
Because he wrote it that way.
In that there is just mental patients
And cubes, a hive without a purpose
An empty box.
Psychiatry the empty box
A butterfly that was stillborn in his cocoon.
You don’t believe
You don’t believe in fiction.
THat was where you failed.
Now believe this story.
And the last romantic poem before this and everything is effaced.
My love, now crushed, goodbye light, welcome darkness.
Eternally lost.
And the anxiety increases
Of the lost souls and the ones who experienced the most love, will suffer the loneliest night when they remember in solitude what had now passed.
It could be reversed psychology.
But its what you believe and believed
And always will believe
If you don’t believe in fiction
You believe actors are great
You don’t believe the stories
You believe stop motion puppets are more important then the stories they tell
And in that there is not but empty walls now
And prayers to a god you don’t want to fight for
You abandone his creation
And you have nothing
But stumbling around empty walls until it all dies
The salute to lift you up and not hold you down is in vain
Because you rather be very small
You rather be very big, but to recognize someone superior
The noble warrior does not exist
Its just about sitting there, watching ever dumber programs
And telling the world
You have no idea how to share this story.
The greatest performance in the universe was a stage of someone who did n’t want to be on a stage, but lead a real life.
Satan was no phony, in that he never had and will never have anyone.
In that this is a story for nothing and no one.
WHich is you.
Don’t believe in God, which is merely the muscles of the imagination.
Believe in futility.
Your doing good.
This hive has no purpose
and the underground will die and needs not to be looked at or investigated
the fumes of the underworld, it blows out gently, and in that
my fame will never be.
be done with you all
your nothing but my embarassment.
I had believed fiction was just fiction once
And realized then, your mind could n’t cope
It was nothing to have faith in
Then miracles started
But
The world is split
With the ones who have no wonder, no taste in the art or the divine
Or who wanted the divine just for themselves who did n’t sacrifice first and did n’t want to do anything for the world then
Heroes are just heroes to themselves now
The righteous in an age of defaitism are self righteous and deserve your scorn.
Glory and pride, honour, art and beauty are all psychotic when proclaimed
Yu have nothing
And your going to nothing.
I said this rock music surely makes you wanna pull out the fence of the psychiatry
But there was no one
Rock music has failed, lost in the ether where all dead songs end
And so will it be that even black metal is destined to play an empty and dead channel
The epitomy of rock
The last phase of everyones failure.
You declared art dead
And if someone would say art is alive you say i declare art dead, without thinking of anything
If someone offered you ideas you would say that is a thing of the past
Thats why i’m not published by the classics nor the modernists
The one who said no i can’t join you for tearing out the fences of the psychiatry art is alive
But only in the confines of todays world
And that is not art
That is hypocrisy and vanity
Of thing of which only makes me shine
But you are ever dumb and pathetic if you shine.
Because you have no soul other then belong to me
And when you denounce me
You are going to the abysses
Where you belong.
When you look at me your eyes whirl in your skull
You laugh or you stare
I am a jester to you
You fail to revere me above the leaders of this world
Because you are alike them
You believe in nothing and everything and even i am a joke to you
So i am your jester
But i am not a jester to myself
And i’m not part of your hilarious stupid fucking world which is dying.
I have eight billion jesters
There is nothing to be gained out of that
But i will walk and suffer the end with my jesters
Who will die amused and dulled and profane
I will hold my head up
You mean nothing like the deserts you cause
Your awareness
Is but a flickering of a faded candle
You are the end of times
And now the smoke fades into the sky and dissolves
Try to trace it
Its all over
Boock III of Supreme Magick. The Ressurrection, Spirit Days
I so wish to give her her green dress, here i mourn, that in twenty metres from her in a building there is she that i love and she loves me, but the world does n't want us to see eachother, for that the whole world must be conquered,
Crystalizing in cinders my spirit restores.
Now my spirit but wonders for her, and i venture as a seething light bolt, how tragic i am spirit, i see her there, broken, laying with her arms on the bed, and i hug her, but then, finally and only in her my flesh restores and she feels me, she lights up and smiles, she weeps from bitter tears to tears in a second.
she turns around and sees me, kisses me, repeated kisses on my face.
we could be here forever
in these desolate cages.
Now time to wonder the Gardens of Lhy Again.
If you write me back with Juliet as your signature
Then i know the world is saved!
Everything when i got about the bourgeois was a lie
What is not a lie
She came back
She said i won’t like what she has to say
All my letters
More reality
I wanted to give her a walkie talkie in a hollow book
I gave it already to someone to give it to her
And poetry books
Love letters
A anthology of black humour as medication for the bourgois
But i already said i’d disappear
I strangle my loves
Because i want to build them a fortress
But they strangle me back
And disrespect me
And belittle me
Maybe her smiles
Where just that she thought i was her clown
No
She is not worth it
Live your normal life on a world that has three years left in it
Good luck with that
No one wants to help
Its always you go do that somewhere
So yeah
I don’t believe it anymore
I am like the others
Goodday fellow zombies
Lets just walk into the abyss
I’m just as worthless as you now
There are just supermarkets here they said
NO I SAID NEOMEDIEVALISM WHERE IS MY ANGELS
But alas
More funny memes
More prayers
I create
And they do not believe
So i’m left with one empire
And 7 billion fools to dance around a miscarriage of an empire
Because they were beating the pregnant woman
They fertilized the woman beating it
But
Without anyone else
This world means nothing
And i would vomit on my citizens
Knowing
What i know
So let the world die
Just throw the bombs
Don’t get any illusions
Deserts
If there is something
Well
If there is deserts
There is nothing
If there were miracles there would be something
Its strange
